Our Life as the Parents of a Preemie

Hopping Back in the Blog Saddle Again

2010-12-20T12:13:00.001-05:00

A lot has happened since our last posts. Two short days after I returned from my professor's memorial service in Iowa, my brother was critically injured in a construction accident. He fell 40 feet onto concrete through an unmarked skylight.

Without going into detail, I'm pleased to fast forward to the present and report that (two and a half weeks later), he has taken some strides, though it will be a long road ahead. Needless to say, life has taken on new meaning since the tragedies of this fall & early winter.

To quote one of my professor's and my favorite musicals, RENT, "There's only us. There's only this. Forget regret or life is yours to miss. No other road, no other way, no day but today." I'm living my life by these lyrics now.

With that, yesterday I started my latest quest to get back into running regularly. I have vowed to run to only Michael Jackson tunes and will run to nothing else until my brother is able to join me again, no matter how long it takes- days, weeks, months or even years.

Why MJ? He's one of both my and E's childhood favorite artists. Our family had 'Thriller' on vinyl (awww yeah) and when my mom was at church council meetings, we (all four of us plus my dad) would blast it at maximum volume and make the house shake. As soon as we saw the family van pull up in the driveway we'd turn it down. :) One of my favorite childhood memories! E & I also share a great love of last year's movie 'This is It' and I plan to take the DVD to the hospital to watch with him sometime soon.

On the Max front, he continues to be a thriving and energetic little dude and the light of our lives. He's currently all about Thomas the Train, trucks and Matchbox cars! His sense of humor and general well-behavedness are sources of pride for both of us. Christmas with his two cousins in the midwest will be very special this year!

M had a very successful fall semester here at Penn State and is just one semester shy of receiving his MFA. It's been a long three years, but well worth it. Feel free to check out his website to see some of his incredible accomplishments! www.mgbensondesigns.com.

I had a great fall as well. I music directed 'Altar Boyz' and 'The Drowsy Chaperone' (which M also designed!) and will be playing Keys2/Guitar2 this spring on 'RENT'. This will be very meaningful and special given the loss of my dear mentor & friend.

I'm just realizing that this post has kind of turned into what would probably be in our Christmas letter (that will not get sent this year), so to wrap this up, we'd like to wish everyone near and far a happy holiday and very blessed and healthy new year. Thanks for reading us! And hey, do me a favor, will you? Take a second to hug your loved ones a little bit longer than usual and tell them how much they mean to you. Life's too short.

National Prematurity Awareness Day

2010-11-17T14:17:00.004-05:00

Today is National Prematurity Awareness Day. According to the March of Dimes website, one in eight babies is born too soon. Our Max was born two months premature and spent one month in the NICU. Not all families are as lucky as we were. Should you choose, I encourage you today to support the March of Dimes or Friends of Maddie, a wonderful organization whose purpose is to support families of premature babies during their time in the NICU. We are honored that Max's story has been posted on their website.

On a lighter note, today (apparently in honor of Prematurity Awareness Day) our preemie taught us that Mom & Dad need to start watching what they say.

Three words: mimicing parrot son.

The Best Part of Wakin' Up...

2010-11-03T15:48:00.002-04:00

So for his birthday, Max's Nana got him a toy Coleman camping grill. It's actually pretty awesome. The burners light up and make noise when you turn them on, and it comes with a myriad of cooking utensils, including tongs, a spatula, frying pan, and of course, a percolator.

Flash forward to last night...I couldn't fall asleep. I had a pain in my side and down my leg that was keeping me up. So when the alarm went off in the morning, I was hitting snooze pretty frequently. At one point, Max came into the bedroom and grabbed my hand with a cheery "Hi!" and tried to pull me out of bed. I suggested he curl up with me for 9 minutes, but he refused; his day was well under way and he wasn't going to let his bleary eyed old man slow him down. Well, I was really interested in those 9 minutes of sleep. I rolled over, Max left the room silently, but rapidly. Nine minutes later, he was back at my bedside, but this time, he had his grill, the percolator, and one of the toy camping mugs. He proceeded to make me a cup of the best pretend coffee I've ever had and served it to me in bed with a huge smile.

That has got to be the best way to wake up in the morning. Period.

Monsters & Homecoming

2010-10-09T21:04:00.007-04:00

I went on a quick jaunt to New York City last weekend to attend an amazing concert honoring a dear friend. It was a whirlwind 40 hours and I was fortunate to see my uncle & aunt, cousin and a handful of very dear friends in the short amount of time I was there. As you can see above, I had my picture taken with a couple of furry monsters in Times Square. After said picture, Cookie Monster started talking to me- "You make donation now?". I was all "For REAL, Cookie?", but gave him a dollar anyway. Then Elmo chimed in, "You make donation?" and I realized that you can't tip Cookie Monster and then leave Elmo hanging, so I gave him a buck as well. It turns out one of my friends had been trying to warn me that they were going to make me pay for the picture, but I was too excited about the prospect of getting a pic of me with two Sesame Street characters for Max. The look on his face when I showed him the picture was worth a MILLION dollars. :)

This weekend was Penn State's Homecoming. Normally I'd hide indoors and stay away from the craziness downtown, but something about having a super interactive 2 year old changed things this year. The weather has been GOR-GEOUS this weekend, so we spent the bulk of yesterday afternoon walking around campus. My ultimate goal was to take him to hear the Alumni Blue Band play whilst eating Creamery ice cream. I ended up heading in the complete opposite direction at first, thus our long walk. We arrived at the Alumni House just in time to hear the last 10 minutes of their concert AND meet the Nittany Lion! We were fortunate to get a really great spot in front of Old Main for the parade, too. We waited about 45 minutes and just as Max was starting to get testy, lo and behold- a firetruck! He was in it to win it from then on. Tractors, light up floats, bands- he had a blast. We definitely have a little percussionist on our hands, too. He loved the bands all around, but whenever the rhythm section marched past he went totally bonkers- screaming, clapping, screeching, you name it! Michael has decided he'll need to take up the bass so we have a whole rhythm section. We'll be on the road like the Partridge Family before you know it!

We Are! Penn State!

2010-10-03T13:44:00.002-04:00

Birthday Party

2010-09-24T21:47:00.005-04:00

Last weekend was an exciting weekend in the household. The show I music directed (ALTAR BOYZ) had a fantastic three day run at Penn State and fulfilled all my childhood rock star dreams. :) (Max's as well- see above pic of him at the drumset!)

Then on Sunday we had a joint birthday party for Max, E (our friend Grace's 3 year old) and A.M. (a faculty member's 3 year old) at a local park. The weather was perfect- sunny and not too hot! Michael grilled and everyone brought lots of yummy side dishes, not to mention the CARS cake for the boys. We were very touched by all of our friend's generosity with gifts for Max. He really stocked up on fun books, trucks, cars, Legos & trains!

In general, we've been so fortunate to have made such awesome friends here at Penn State. Every different group has been so amazing with Max and just adores him. He's become a mascot of sorts for all the theatre folk at everything from the paint/scene shops to rehearsal to production meetings. We're so thankful that everyone is so accepting of having a little dude running around underfoot.

Happy 2nd Birthday, Miracle Max!

2010-09-05T08:52:00.003-04:00

Happy 2nd Birthday to our amazing son, Maxwell George! It's hard to believe it's been two whole years since we became a family of three. We have treasured every day and look forward to many, many more. We love you more than life and pray that it continues to fill you with wonder.

Specs

2010-09-01T23:57:00.003-04:00

This is how we pass the time away in Wal-Mart while we wait for prescriptions to be filled. P.S. This little whippersnapper is going to be TWO this Sunday. What?!

I think the glasses make him look like an Asian version of Sid the Science Kid's grandma. The one with the creepy laugh. I may be biased, but Max is cuter.

Running For My Health

2010-08-13T21:47:00.002-04:00

We will continue to post about the Maxster here, but I have started another blog to chronicle my running and health related issues. You can find it at: www.runangerun.wordpress.com.

Double Digits, Baby!

2010-08-06T16:18:00.002-04:00

I ran 10 miles non-stop this afternoon. TEN. 1-0. Double digits! Whoa.

M & M are out of town for the weekend visiting family, but I stayed behind because I'm playing aux keyboard for a delightful production of Hairspray. (One more performance tonight- come on down!) So I've got a lot of free time on my hands, which I won't lie- is a big fat slice of heaven. ;) Max has been waking up anywhere between 3-5 am this week for various reasons (thirsty, wanting to play, etc), so it was awesome to sleep through the night last night.

But I digress. I started training for a 10k a couple weeks ago in hopes of running one before Thanksgiving. I've been a pretty hardcore treadmill fan because it's what I can use while Max is in daycare at the gym. Monday of this week I decided to switch it up: I took him to the daycare at the Y branch in town, which is further from our place, but has a 2 hour time limit. (A whole hour more than the local branch!) After I dropped him off, I ran an awesome trail within the vicinity of the gym. I feel like I get a better workout when I run outside and really wanted to kick things up a notch. I ran 5k on Mon and then 4 miles on Wednesday. Knowing I'd be alone at home this weekend and didn't have a time constraint, I planned to make today my 'long run' day.

I headed out with the intention of doing 5 miles, possibly 10k if I had the gumption and was feeling it. It was the perfect day- not humid at all, a nice breeze, amazing views and sunny to boot! I ended up running to the post office in the next 'town' over and arrived at 12:34. I'm kind of a numbers geek, so the time number order tickled me to no end. (Insert geeky *snort* here.) That was about 4 miles, so I made it my goal to run all the way home and top out at 8 miles. Honestly, I didn't really think I'd be able to do it, but I figured I'd be happy as long as I got to 10k (6.2 mi). I was feeling great by 10k, so I decided to extend my route. Again, the numbers were in my head and DOUBLE DIGITS (aka 10) were inching towards the front of the line. I finished my extended route and headed through some pretty residential neighborhoods and was still feeling good until about 8.5 miles. Then I started to whimper and trying to talk myself into stopping and/or walking.

The bull-headed side of me won out. If I was going to do this, I was going to do it without stopping! Needless to say, the final mile and a half was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle slow and painful. If I'D seen me on the road at that point, I'd have stopped and asked if I was okay and needed a ride home.

But I did it. 10 MILES. 3.8 miles over my previous personal best of one 10k on the treadmill! Excuse me while I go take an ice bath...

(Oh! I should note that this run would not have been possible had it not been for my Bondi Band and Mind Over Matter hat! The combination of the headband and hat kept ALL sweat out of my eyes for the WHOLE run. I'm not even joking! This. Is. Major. Note: M.O.M. is a non-profit organization founded by one of my elementary school classmates and her family in honor & memory of her mother. The purpose is to encourage "personal wellness" and "community betterment" – enabling people to help others while helping themselves. Karen has been very encouraging in my running efforts and I'm proud to wear my M.O.M. hat!)

Happy Birthday, Michael!

2010-07-28T18:33:00.002-04:00

Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband, my better half and my baby daddy! :)

Cupcake Wars!

2010-07-23T15:07:00.003-04:00

My cousin and his wife were contacted by the Food Network to submit a video application to be on 'Cupcake Wars'! How cool is that? :) Here's a link to their video- take a look if you have a spare minute or two! The FN folks will watch it tonight and the more hits it has, the better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpeZQeOPsXg

Semi-Wordless Wednesday

2010-07-21T17:31:00.003-04:00

I asked Max to help select some books at the library this afternoon. His random pick off the shelf? 'Amazing You: Getting Smart About Your Private Parts'. Mom isn't quite ready to teach him about boy & girl parts yet, so we went with Curious George and The Pigeon.

And so it begins...

Wordless Wednesday

2010-07-14T20:44:00.002-04:00

Max's 1st Minor League Baseball Game

2010-07-12T22:01:00.007-04:00

Thanks to the generosity of the theatre department, we attended the State College Spikes vs. Vermont Lake Monsters baseball game last night. Michael & I used to love to go to Winston-Salem Warthogs games when we lived there several years ago. (Fun fact: a PSU alum/friend was the mascot, Wally the Warthog! We didn't know it at the time, though! I used to basically stalk him and take a bazillion pictures during each game.) It was fun to think back to that time and then realize we were at another minor league game WITH OUR SON. :) He had a grand old time eating ballpark fries & a corn dog and cheering at the top of his lungs. Max & I stayed until about the middle of the 2nd inning, but then he was ready to head home for bath & bed. I'm told that the Spikes won!

Firecracker 4K

2010-07-06T11:19:00.007-04:00

My friend Kelly and I ran the 4th of July Firecracker 4K on Sunday. Kelly is the most awesome of awesome friends because she normally runs much faster, but registered to run the race *with* me at MY pace to keep me going. It meant so much to me- thanks, Kell!

Registration and the starting line was near the Penn State football stadium. This was my first racing 'chip' race (a chip you attach to your shoe that electronically marks your start & finish times), but I didn't know what it was at first. I'd heard 'tell' of the racing chip from experienced runner friends, but my previous races were the kind with racing tags that you pin to your shirt.

The race started with a lone firework and we were off! We passed Michael & Max on our right hand side a few minutes into the race, which was great motivation. We started off at a nice comfortable pace (one that was a bit faster than what I normally run) and I actually felt like I could hold my own with the pack. We were amused by a dude dressed in patriot 'gear', as well as two guys in full fireman outfits. (Side note: I just heard a radio blip about them this morning- one of them lost 25 lbs training for the race! They ran in their gear to promote physical fitness of firefighters.)

Kelly was the BEST running coach all throughout the race. She kept me going by pointing out buildings that her architectural engineering firm had worked on, as well as reminded me that I could do it and that we had only 'this' much left before we were done with a hill. It got pretty rough around the 2 mile mark and I honestly don't think I'd have finished had it not been for her!
Michael & Max had walked to the Creamery and were waiting for us as we passed. Again, much needed encouragement. You just can't beat hearing your son and husband yelling "Yay! Go!" :) After the Creamery we were in the home stretch. I spotted a woman in front of us that I'd passed in the Black Moshannon 5K last month and the competitive side of me said that I couldn't let her beat me. We eventually passed her, but I was hurting by this point. Surprisingly, my legs weren't the problem- it was my shoulders & arms. They felt like complete dead weights. The only possible explanation for the aches that I can think of is that I've been playing piano all day long every day for the past week and my muscles were sore? In any case, it was very weird and frustrating.

As we neared the stadium/finish, Kelly asked if I was ready to go for it. We saw a couple running in front of us and they were kind of in our way, so I said yes and we started sprinting. (Well, for me it was sprinting anyway. Haha!) We spotted one more woman in front of us and Kelly asked if I wanted to try to pass her. This time I said no, but I think when it was all said and done, we did actually catch up to her.

It was a great feeling to sprint over the finish line pad, but I was d-o-n-e. I immediately sat down in the grass because I felt like I was going to hurl. Kelly asked me to get up and walk across the street to get some water and then I could sit down again. Thank goodness she did or I'd definitely have gotten sick.

The final results were: 119th out of 146 in my age group and 812th out of at least 988 runners. I definitely found this race to be tougher than the 5K, but I also ran at a faster pace and endured more hills on this one.

And it was so awesome to have a friend by my side.

He talks!

2010-06-25T21:28:00.002-04:00

Max: "Daaad!" (to Michael as he's trying to nap)
Michael: "Yes, Maxwell?"
Max: "It's me!"

Aaaaaand... scene.

Big Boy Bed

2010-06-22T22:59:00.002-04:00

Well, the transition has been made! Max has now successfully slept in his big boy bed for three nights. I'm probably jinxing us by even writing about it, but it turned out to be a very smooth transition.

We decided to put Max in a regular single bed (with a railing) right away instead of spending the money on a toddler bed he'd outgrow. Michael went to pick up his childhood single, the headboard and some bedding on Saturday. Max and I stayed in town and made a trip to Target so he could pick out his own sheets. I'd been thinking all along that he'd go for Thomas the Train (trains are his big thing right now), but there was no doubt of the winner when his eyes lit up at the sight of Toy Story 3 sheets!

To say that the transition has been a dream would be an understatement. The first night (Sat) I only had to put him back into bed 10 times in a span of 10 minutes. The following night, it took Michael only 4 times and last night NONE. He just had to encourage Max to lie down as he was leaving the room and that was it- he was out! We're fortunate that he loves his new bed so much! I even found him playing on it earlier this afternoon, just hanging out. So awesome.

The other perk is that he's been getting solid sleep. We figure it's due to the extra warmth of the blankets (being tucked in is kind of like being back in the womb?) and he wakes up fully refreshed and chipper in the mornings.

Including this morning at 5am.

We'll work on that one...

Happy Father's Day to...

2010-06-20T16:37:00.006-04:00

My wonderful husband- watching you with our son melts my heart a gazillion times a day. You're an incredible man and an even better father! We are both so lucky!

My own Dad- hope you're having a great vacation! Thank you for your love and support over the years!

My Grandpa, my 'Buddy', who is watching from above. I miss and love you!

Michael's Dad, Don, also above- your son is the best dad in the world and I have no doubt that he learned it from you.

And finally, to my brother-in-law, James. Today is his very 1st Father's Day, as his wife Katie gave birth to their very first child (Ian) yesterday afternoon!

"Any man can be a Father, but it takes someone special to be a Dad"

It's Transition Time...

2010-06-15T20:52:00.008-04:00

Dear Max,

You are currently 21 months and 10 days old. Last night you gave me the second biggest scare of my life with you thus far- you crawled/fell out of your crib. Oh, mylanta!

You'd had a fun bath and had even let me read you three whole stories before I put you down. You weren't happy when I did, though. And you let me know it. I knew you were tired though, Little Stinker, so I left the room. As I was about to close the door I saw you kick your leg up over the side of the crib railing. Where did you get that flexibility?! (Certainly not from your parental units!) I knew that was Bad News Bears right away, but you sat back down and I closed the door.

You continued to cry and wail. Not even Miles Davis could soothe you! And then I heard it: a scream like none of the others and a thud. I KNEW.

I ran to your room within two seconds and you were lying on your back ON THE FLOOR and doing that scary scream cry thing where your face turns completely red because you're crying so hard and aren't breathing. I picked you up, got you to breathe and we sat there on the floor together- rocking and crying.

You were okay within 5 minutes or so, but I wasn't. (I might be a little 'over dramatic' and 'touchy' when it comes to things regarding your well-being.) We went back out to the living room and cuddled in the recliner while watching Toy Story 2 and waiting for your Dad to get home from work. When he arrived, you greeted him in your usual cheery way. He read you some more stories and you enjoyed your 'Man Time', then went down for bed like a perfect angel.

Tonight I learned why you wouldn't go down for me. I apparently forgot to make your stuffed penguin 'Gee' dance and tickle you before putting you down. My bad.

I'm so glad you're okay, Bubba.

Love,
Mama

P.S. You don't know it yet, but you're totally getting a big boy bed w/railings this weekend. And we're going to appoint Bernie as your guard dog.

Our Sweet Boy

2010-06-08T19:30:00.002-04:00

I'm so proud of the sweet boy Max is turning into. Some recent examples that have completely melted my heart:

- We were having a sing-along before bedtime books and as I was singing one of the songs I used to sing to him in the NICU (a childhood Disney favorite from 'Oliver & Company'), he leaned in, put his head on my shoulder and held my hand. Just because.

- Max has become extremely attached to some of the other MFA design students, Grace in particular. Last night at dinner, Grace excused herself to use the restroom and Max's eyes teared up and he started bawling until she returned.

- We went to the gym after dinner tonight and when I was finished working out and went to pick up Max from the daycare room, the response I received was: "How old is is he? (21 mos) He's SO SMART! We've been sitting here laughing in stitches the whole time!" As we were headed to the door, Max waved goodbye and the lady asked if she could have the toy Max was apparently trying to swipe. She asked for the toy again and he thought she meant to say goodbye, so he waved again. Repeat, only this time he thought she wanted a hug, so he walked over to the rocking chair and kissed her arm and nestled his head in the crook of her arm.

- After bathtime I told him that being his mom was the best job in the world. He leaned in and kissed me on the lips.

- Michael just recited Green Eggs & Ham over speakerphone to Max from memory before bedtime. (Incredible!) As he was saying goodnight, Max (who had been holding the phone up to his ear) kissed the mouthpiece.

I can't get enough of this kid.

TGIF!

2010-06-04T18:23:00.001-04:00

National Running Day

2010-06-02T11:18:00.003-04:00

Today is National Running Day! I went to the gym this morning with the intent of running a 5K (3.1mi) on the treadmill. Once I hit that point, I decided to go for 5mi, which was one mile more than my previous record. There was something in the air though (*sniff sniff* Running Day, perhaps?) and I decided to just go for a 10K (6.2mi). CRAZY!

I'm living proof it's never too late to start running. Enjoy the day, everyone!

Ahhh, technology!

2010-06-01T12:33:00.004-04:00

When my siblings and I were younger, one of our favorite pasttimes was going to swim at the 'high school pool'. We lived a mere 5 blocks from it, so we were allowed to ride our bikes or walk to it often during the hot summers. We had a family pass and we definitely made use of the unlimited swimming. Each of us had a silver safety pin that we pinned on our suits.

On the occasion that we went swimming in the evening, we'd call our parents from the pay phone in the lobby to let them know that we were ready for pick-up by calling the operator and placing a collect call. I can't even count the number of calls we made that went like this: "Hello, you have a collect call from Werereadycanyoucomepickusup. Will you accept the charges?"

They never did and we always had a ride home. :)

The point for this story is that I'm in constant amazement of technology. I fought getting a cell phone for the longest time (my ten years younger brother even had one before I did!). I finally gave in while I was on tour in '03 and my long distance relationship with Michael was blossoming. (Mind you, I owe my roommate Michele a ton for the lend of HER cell phone until I finally got my own!) The fact that I can access my email, internet, Facebook and about a gazillion other things on my phone now is just ridiculous. I'm in love with my BlackBerry, but sometimes it scares me. With. It's. Sheer. Power.

And don't get me started on computers! We've had the misfortune of both our desktop and my laptop kicking the bucket in recent months, but we still have Michael's laptop. (Thankfully!) And this afternoon I'm about to charter new waters: I'm auditioning a drummer for one of my fall shows via SKYPE.

Yes, that's right. He's going to set up his drumset somewhere else in PA and I'm going to video call him to watch/hear him play. This is blowing my mind!

And I love it. :)

Angie's First 5K

2010-05-29T20:54:00.005-04:00

Today was my first 5K and it was a huge rush. It was held at a gorgeous state park about 40 min from our house. I woke up this morning with a sour stomach and pre-race jitters, but was luckially able to kick it with Pepto and a nice half hour walk around the neighborhood with Max in the jogging stroller. :)

I registered about an hour before the race and then warmed up & stretched on a little dock on the water. It was so peaceful. I'm not sure of how many runners there were, but it was a lot. As we were waiting to start people around me were commenting on how there were so many more than in the past. A totally buff wheelchair cyclist started 5 min ahead of us and then we were off.

I specifically stayed at the back of the pack, knowing that I'd probably finish there and so as not to get too caught up in the adrenaline and start off too fast. There were three other women who seemed to be in the same boat, which was (honestly) a relief. I was literally last at this point though. I felt a little blah about it, but kept telling myself "Slow and steady wins the race".

At 1.75 mi or so there was a turnaround. As people started running past us (on their way back already) I noticed that some were walking and panting like dogs. It worried me because I didn't know what was ahead, yet energized me to keep my pace so I could run the whole thing. I decided to try to pass the woman in front of me at the turnaround and ended up passing four people before the race was over.

Shortly after the 2 mi mark, a little boy's mom & grandma were waiting for him. (He was running in front of me.) The mom asked him how he was doing and he collapsed in her arms and started bawling. I about lost it! The little chugger was so so tired. I kept going and a few minutes later heard him behind me again. =)

Michael & Max were waiting for me at about the 2.25-35 mi mark and seeing them was JUST what I needed! Michael had his camera and new lens ready and Max was waving and grinning from ear to ear. As I told Michael, seeing them during a race is one of my favorite sights! Their support means so much to me.

The rest of the race was tough, as my adrenaline after seeing them started to wear down. The final part of the course included a huge hill. I thought for sure I'd have to walk, but pushed myself to kind of leap up it- just enough movement that it wasn't considered walking. ;) The final stretch was all downhill, which was actually such a tease because it was down and my legs just wanted to stop and give out.

I sprinted the last leg though and just prayed that I wouldn't fall on my face in front of everyone. People were cheering and it was a feeling like no other! I finished in 41:06 (I'm pretty sure that's what the clock said), which was just a minute/6 sec over my goal of 40 min or under. All things considered, I'm thrilled! I honestly didn't feel 100% ready to go for a 5K yet, but decided to just go for it. Life's too short to sit on the bench.

I'm glad I did. The July 4th 4K will be a breeze now!

UPDATE: Just got my race results- I placed 230th out of 234 male/female runners and I'm thrilled! Who'da freakin' thunk I'd ever be able to run 3.1 mi non-stop and without getting stitches/cramps in my side?!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-05-26T02:42:00.004-04:00

The Latest From the Homefront

2010-05-18T11:25:00.003-04:00

First and foremost, Michael got a 4.0 this semester! We're so proud of him- he's such a hard worker! He enjoyed his first relaxing day of fishing at the state park this past Sunday. Lots 'o carp, but hopefully better luck next time!

I booked a gig music directing/playing [title of show] this summer. It's a hilarious show that played both off & on Broadway. My friend Benjamin was the male cover for both incarnations. I'm so excited to finally work with Rich of Singing Onstage! He's a newly MFA'ed director from Penn State.

My 'other' summer project is training to run the 4th of July Fireworks 4K here in town. The course is all around the PSU campus (hello, hills) and is open to both runners & walkers. My goal is to run at least half of the race, if not more.

Sir Maxwell seems to have hit the 'Terrible Twos' a few months early. We have good days and bad days and it's all very Jekyll & Hyde-ish. He can go from being the happiest cheeriest boy in the world to a feisty & growly little guy within minutes. I've heard rumors that patience is a virtue... ;)

We're looking forward to walking the Survivors Lap at the Relay for Life this coming weekend. Michael, Max, Nana & Me- we're a team! We'll also be celebrating Uncle Dave's birthday as well. Hoping for sunny weather!

Have a great week, everyone!

The Day We Lost the Phunk

2010-05-13T15:20:00.004-04:00

Max and I headed to Sam's Club this afternoon to pick up a few things. As usual, Elephunk joined us on the excursion. Given to Max by my friend Calley, Elephunk is his #1 comfort toy and a constant companion. (Note his presence on the right hand side of the table at our Mother's Day brunch!)

Although we didn't have a long list, we walked all over the store. Max loves the high ceilings, lights and flirting with the sample ladies. Before we were getting ready to check out, I decided to stop by the restroom. I picked up Max, his diaper bag and...

The Phunk was missing?!?!

I panicked. We backtracked through every aisle at top speed. (Literally, sprinting!) He'd dropped it once before, so it didn't even cross my mind to stop by the service desk. I half expected to just see the random grey stuffed elephant lying on an aisle floor.

Distraught, I finally headed to customer service. There were three people in front of us and I was freaking out. My heart was racing and all I could think was "What are we going to do?! He needs him to go to sleep!"

I turned my head and caught a glimpse of The Phunk on the back counter. WHEW!

When we made our way to the front of the line, I said "I'm here to claim that stuffed elephant." The customer service lady said "I was wondering whose this was! Someone brought it to us and the first thing I thought was "Some little kid is going to be VERY upset!""

No kidding. And don't even get me started on his mom!

Angie's 1st Race

2010-05-10T13:53:00.007-04:00

Three months ago when we joined the Y, I couldn't even run three minutes on the treadmill without getting winded. I can now run over an hour non-stop and this weekend I ran my first race- a 1.5K.

Humans and dogs getting ready for the 1.5K part of the day. (The 5K was an hour earlier.)

And we're off! A gust of wind caught my earphones. Please notice (as noted by Michael) that the woman & dog on the right hand side of the picture look oddly similar! Jolly good fun!

The homestretch!

Cue 'Chariots of Fire'!

I finished 7th out of thirtysome humans/dogs! My goal had been to run non-stop and miraculously, I achieved it. (As I shouted over and over to Michael as I passed him at the end of the course- "I didn't stop! I didn't stop!") It was very windy and wow, I felt it on 3/4 of the race, as it was around a huge open field! Wind aside though, it turned out to be a great day (it was supposed to be cloudy & rainy) and I hope to run the 5K next year!

Happy Mother's Day

2010-05-09T18:44:00.002-04:00

"Happy Mother's Day" means more
Than have a happy day.
Within those words lie lots of things
We never get to say.
It means I love you first of all,
Then thanks for all you do.
It means you mean a lot to me,
And that I honor you.

But most of all, I guess it means
That I am thinking of
Your happiness on this, your day,
With pleasure and with love.

- Unknown

Happy Mother's Day to all Moms- past, present & future. Especially ours!

P.S. And thanks to Michael & Max for making me a mom!

CATS. Now & Forever!

2010-04-29T20:45:00.002-04:00

Run, Forrest! Run!

2010-04-24T21:59:00.003-04:00

This was my first week back at working out since Bruce's unfortunate break and it was my best EVER.

Like in my whole 33 years of life.

Not being able to walk/run really put a damper on my spirits over the past few weeks. I started feeling sluggish and wanting to sleep alll the time and was just uninspired. Lamesauce, I know. So on Monday I recommitted to my workouts and I feel better than ever.

I specifically made myself run at an extremely slow pace (3.0 walk, 3.5 run) on purpose, seeing as it was my first week back after almost 4 weeks. In the beginning it felt too slow, but I don't want to injure myself. Slowing it down turned out to be the best thing I could have ever done. On Monday I did walk/run intervals for a half hour.

On Tuesday my goal was to do another half hour of 1min walk/1min run. After a 5 min walking warm-up, I did 10 min of that (3.0 walk/3.5 run). I kind of psyched myself out at first because I could see myself in a mirror and kept thinking "This feels sooo slow and I look like I'm prancing". At the 11th min (run) I decided to go into a 2nd min of running. I was specifially reminding myself to not jack up the speed, seeing as this was my 2nd day back at it, but figured it wouldn't hurt to run an extra minute (at 3.5). By this point I was feeling like "Why not just stay at this speed and test how long you can actually go?" So the 2nd minute passed and I kept going. I didn't feel tired at ALL and it felt great, so I decided to go for 5 min running. In full disclosure, I honestly didn't think I'd actually get there. (Have never done before, BTW- I think 3 min has been my max so far) 5 min turned to 6, and 7, and I decided to shoot for 10. Around 8 I started to get the start of a little stitch in my side, but being the bullhead I am, I wasn't going to give up till I reached 10. By 10 the stitch was gone. I ended up doing 15 minutes! I really don't think I'd EVER run this long (consecutively) in my life! I wanted to go for 20, but my right ankle started to ache a bit and I could see Max thru the glass window in the daycare room and could see that he was crying.

Thursday was monumental. After a 5 min walking warm-up, I decided to run. It was my goal to do 15 min @ 3.5 again, so I figured it'd be good to just get it done at the front end of my workout so I wouldn't tire. I intended to do the last 15 min as 1min walk/1min run. At 15 I decided to go for 20. 20 was the FIRST time I started to feel a little tired, but my mind went into high gear and said "Try for a half hour- you've already run longer than what you have left!" So I did and I wasn't tired at all! I was actually RUNNING and not huffing and puffing *and* it felt great!

I had my own Biggest Loser moment when I hit a half hour. I shed a couple tears of joy/amazement/"Holy crap, I can't believe I'm actually doing it!" and then did a 5 min walk cool down.

I planned to try for another 30 min run today. (Wanted to make sure that Thursday wasn't a fluke!) I did the usual 5 min walking warm-up, then started up. I've been using the same music mix for quite awhile now and am getting kind of bored of it, so after two songs I switched to a cast recording that two of my new Danish friends are on. Long story short, I ended up running for the duration of the whole album! By the last three songs I was ready to be done, but wasn't going to stop. I specifically covered up the clock with a magazine and didn't look at it much today, which helped. I think I checked in at 17 min, 30 min and then when I was finished. (50 min/3 mi) And I didn't get a stitch in my side AT ALL!

I DO feel like I've been hit by a semi as I post this, though. No pain, no gain, eh?

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

2010-04-21T23:25:00.003-04:00

Talkin' on a... chicken phone. (Story to come soon in a future blog!)

An Evening at the Park

2010-04-10T21:05:00.008-04:00

No troubled water here, folks!
Wheee!!!
"I spy with my little eye... a DUCK!"

It's been awhile since I've blogged about the little man, so there's two major things to report about Max in his current state:

1) He's going through a massive growth spurt and can't get enough food down his gullet. (Recent examples: Last night's dinner- a huge biscuit with hamburger meat, a yogurt, more meat, green beans & applesauce; Today's breakfast- a big bowl of Kix with milk & juice; Lunch- Alphabet soup, green beans, mac & cheese; Afternoon snack at his request- graham crackers, 2 eggs) Yup. A bottomless pit, that one!

2) He's taken to telling me when he's stir crazy and wants to get out of the house. He'll either a) drag the Ergo carrier to my feet, b) bring me his shoes, or c) stand and dance at the front door. We'd gone on a walk around the neighborhood this morning, but he was ready for more come late afternoon.

I hadn't really decided where we were going, but I packed him into the car and we headed out. It was a beautiful sunny day, so we ended up at a local park. I figured I'd chase him around the playground for awhile before dinner and wear both of us out! As if playground equipment wasn't exciting enough, the park also has a huge pond (and dam!) and ducks 'a plenty! One of our favorite past-times is chasing the ducks. Today was no exception. (See above) Max's very original way of getting the duck's attention was to yell "Hello! Hello!"

We chased ducks for awhile and crossed a couple of the bridges. I'm sure every parent thinks this, but I *still* can't get over watching this actual LITTLE BOY run everywhere and take my hand to walk up the steps by himself! (Cue tiny string section and me crying softly in the corner remembering 'days gone by'.)

It seems as though I get seasonal allergies every other year and this year is apparently an 'on' year. How conveeenient, as it's supposedly one of the worst years for pollen! ;) ALAS, the sneezing and runny nose that I'm fighting right now as I type is worth a gazillion hours in the great pollenated outdoors due to the following incident:

At the end of one bridge we ran into a family playing frisbee. Max tried to join the game. The family consisted of Mom, Dad, a tween daughter & son and a little blond haired piggie tailed daughter about Max's age. (Or size, at any rate) They eyed each other as if to say "Hey. We're the same height. Whattup?"

Before I knew it, my son stepped closer. Wrapped his arms around her in a hug. And KISSED her on the cheek!

Needless to say, the parents and I were all "Awww! That's so sweet!" (gush gush gush) The girl, however, was confused. "Dude, this is MY dance space. Why are you invading my dance space?!"... and walked away.

Max was equally confused. He shot me a look (that melted my heart) that said "Maaaw! I thought I was supposed to be nice! Wasn't I being a good boy by hugging and kissing her?"

I wish I could just wrap him up and keep him at this age and level of innocence forever. Something tells me his dad and I are going to have a helluva time once he's a teenager, though.

P.S. I can't wait. :)

In Memory of Michael H.

2010-04-09T20:18:00.003-04:00

Michael H. was a very special boy. The son of my dear friend Jenn, he was born with a serious heart condition and underwent three heart surgeries during his short life.

Michael passed away a year ago today at the age of 9.

Jenn and I met during the summer of '98 while working at a summerstock theatre in the northwoods of Wisconsin. Much like many of my theatre experiences, we were part of a tight knit group that has stayed in touch over the past 12 years, though we (Jenn & I) have not seen each other but maybe once since. (A shame, I know.) I did not have the fortune of meeting Michael in person, but I've always loved hearing and reading stories about him from Jenn.

Michael was an avid Star Wars fan who loved to dance, snuggle, watch the movie 'Elf' and most importantly, loved his Mommy. I didn't 'know' him, but I know this is true.

I'll never forget you, Michael H. You are the best form of sunshine, for you were borne of the sun herself.

In Memory of Maddie

2010-04-07T21:26:00.005-04:00

One year ago today a beautiful little girl named Maddie flew to Heaven. Like our Max, Maddie was a preemie and had been born just shy of 29 weeks. Her lungs were scarred due to her prematurity and on April 6 of last year she came down with a respiratory infection. She passed away very unexpectedly the following day.

I'll never forget the shock I felt when I learned of her death. I spent the rest of the day in a haze. My heart broke for her parents, Heather and Mike. Having a preemie of our own, it hit way too close to home.

Maddie's vibrant smile and personality united the interwebs like I've never witnessed before. Today, the anniversary of her passing, is no exception. Purple (the color of the March of Dimes) is everywhere, including on my toes. She was (and continues to be) so loved by all.

Heather & Mike have since formed an incredible organization called Friends of Maddie. It's main focus is supporting parents & families with a child in the NICU and is a cause I encourage everyone to support.

Another way to support is to donate to the March of Dimes. Here's an excerpt of their mission statement: "Our mission is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality". Every year there is a walk called The March for Babies with locations all across the country, not to mention hundreds of teams that walk in memory of Maddie. Should you care to donate to the cause, I encourage you to support my dear friend Colleen's team in Jacksonville, FL. Follow this link to her website and click on the March for Babies logo on the right hand side. Thank you.

At the Copa

2010-04-06T21:43:00.004-04:00

Seven years ago I toured the country with a delightfully cheesy musical called Barry Manilow's Copacabana. It was truly a blast and I made the most amazing friends. This past weekend a bunch of us reunited in Pittsburgh for an early 1st birthday party for one of our 'Copa Offspring'. Between the cast/pit/crew, I believe there are now 7 boys and 1 girl with at least one more expected sometime soon! (There were 4 boys, including Max, in attendance on Saturday.) It was so good to see everyone again and to meet the other kids for the first time!

Bruce

2010-03-27T03:47:00.005-04:00

Bruce is the name I gave my right big toe back in my college days. Believe it or not, I dare say I was sober when I named him! I can't remember the reason why, but it seemed (and still seems) fun at the time. *teehee*

Bruce is broken.

This past Sunday I tripped on the curb while taking the garbage out in the dark. (Smart, I know!) I would have taken a major faceplant had I not caught my balance, but it didn't register that Bruce might actually be broken until Wednesday night. I honestly thought the puffiness/discomfort was from the fact that I wore heels for the first time in forever for my show last week. I worked out on Monday, but then took the rest of the week off because it was so painful and finally called the doctor on Thursday.

Max passed the time away by flirting with all of the nurses on the floor. He (willingly) went to the nurse who checked me in and they left the room to visit the others while I waited for my doctor. That kid is shameless! After the initial exam, I was sent upstairs to get x-rayed. And yes, Max flirted with MORE nurses while I was in the x-ray room! (I'll admit, he *was* pretty adorable in his Osh Kosh B'Gosh overalls and Penn State sweatshirt.)

Long story short, Bruce is 'mildly' broken. Had the impact been thismuch harder I would have fractured him and had to have worn a cast & boot, so if there's any kind of broken toe to have, this is the one. I'll have it taped for 2-3 weeks and have instructions for no running. I'm to use 'good judgement' on walking workouts, but was gently reminded that the more I push the longer it'll take to heal. So I guess I'm more or less back on the 'couch' part of the Couch To 5K plan. ;) For now anyway.

Perhaps you're all thinking it's weird that my toe (and only this particular one) has a name? Yes, I'll admit it- it's definitely weird. Or 'quirky' as I prefer to call it. This whole broken toe thing amuses me even more BECAUSE it has a name! My college roommates are probably the only people who truly understand because they were there when I went looney tunes and named it. They sent very thoughtful texts and voicemails yesterday (to him) as I waited for my appointment. They care about poor ol' Brucie like he's family. HAHA!

And as for my husband, bless him for 'playing along' with me...

Me: "Bruce doesn't look so good tonight"
Michael: "No, he sure doesn't"

See? LOVE that he totally goes with me on it and refers to Bruce by his correct gender. :) Again, not sure why he has a name OR a gender.

Not sure how I made it 33 years without a broken bone either! Victory?!

18 Month Check-Up

2010-03-25T17:03:00.004-04:00

Max had his year and a half wellness check-up this morning. Little Dude now weighs in at 21 lbs, 4 oz and is 32.5" tall. I was concerned that he'd only gained a half pound since his last check-up, but his pediatrician wasn't worried and even suggested that he 'just might be destined to be slender'. Is it wrong that I laughed? :) In any case, all looks great in Max Land and his future's so bright he's gotta wear shades!

In other news, Michael had his three month CT scan on Monday... and all is clear! BOO-YA!

Today is both of my brother's birthdays! Happy Birthday, Guys! We love you!

Cheap Thrills

2010-03-18T00:04:00.003-04:00

Tonight (well, last night) was dress rehearsal for my show. I found a fantastic deal on a sassy black dress at Kohl's the other day ($60 marked down to $15- hello?!) and wore it to rehearsal.

As I was walking from the parking garage to the theatre, a 20-something dude yelled "Sweet legs!". I turned around and he said "Yours!" and pointed at me. I'm sure the look on my face was priceless, as I was sure he was talking to someone else and it was going to be one of those embarrassing moments where you wave back to someone only to find out that they're waving to the person *directly behind you*. The insecure side of me was also ready with a comeback of "Why are you making fun of me, you little punk? I'm someone's MOTHER!"

On the flip side, had I not been the happily married lady that I am, I would have wanted to french kiss him and thank him for noticing how hard I've been working at the gym. :)

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-17T01:52:00.001-04:00

Engaged!

2010-03-16T00:13:00.003-04:00

My baby brother proposed to his wonderful girlfriend of almost 7 years while on the beach in the Dominican Republic on spring break last week. THRILLING! (He will *always* be my baby brother though!)

The Great? Outdoors

2010-03-13T20:14:00.003-05:00

Well, I went for it. Early this morning I did my very first walk/run outside. It was not perhaps the best day weather-wise to move out of my comfort zone of a gym treadmill, but it was an eye-opener to say the very least!

A couple of days ago a new runner friend (Stephan) told me about the Budd Coates 5K Program. It's basically the Couch To 5K deal, only you train for four days of the week instead of three. Some may think me crazy, but I actually prefer doing four days. I'm just anal enough that I feel 'lazy' if I'm doing a three day week and take more days 'off' than what I'm working out.

So I decided to start over at the very beginning. (A very good place to start, so sayeth Maria VonTrapp! *Haha! Groan*) I probably could have skipped to the 2nd week, but when it's all said and done, I want to be able to say that I've finished a 'full' program. I had originally planned to do my regular treadmill thing and was actually looking forward to it, but couldn't sleep this morning, so I decided to go for it- new program, new environment.

This morning was 40 degrees, drizzly and kinda windy. (Yup. Real smart, newbie.) I suited up in sweats and mittens and headed out as soon as it was light. After a five minute walking warm-up, I moved into the intervals of Week 1: 2 min running followed by 4 min of walking (repeated 5x). To say I had somehow not prepared myself mentally for the change in terrain and weather would be an understatement. The first two minutes of running were brutal with a capital bru! My mind: "I have four MORE of these to go?! Man, it's cold out here! This wind stuff hurts my lungs! Whoa, that worm was HUGE, it looks like a family of worms glued themselves together and said "Come on gang, let's slither to town as a team!""

Well, all drama aside, I managed to get through all five intervals. I won't lie, I strategically maneuvered myself to level streets during the running and I was by no means fast. (Not that it was the goal or anything!) And though it wasn't, a lot of the running felt like it was *this shy* of being considered walking. At one particular point when I thought I was going to keel over, my music switched to an awesome techno version of 'O Fortuna' from Carmina Burana. I normally love this track because it's placed in my mix at a point where I'm usually feeling really strong. (Ahem, when I'm on a treadmill.) Today it just mocked me, as did Michael Jackson. "You wanna be startin' something? You got to be startin' something! You wanna be? You gotta be!" etc etc etc.

Riiiiiight, MJ.

Well, not yet anyway. :)

Random Thoughts

2010-03-11T13:31:00.003-05:00

This morning Max and I headed to the gym to swim during the early morning open swim hours. We left the house at 8, arrived by 8:25, suited up and took a (cold) shower by 8:35 and walked out of the locker room to the pool... the pool that is currently closed during spring break for cleaning. Um, whoops. So we took a nice (warm) shower, got dressed and Max went to play in the daycare room while I worked out.

As we were *leaving* I noticed a big fat sign on the front door saying "Therapy pool closed this week for cleaning". For real. Not sure how I missed it on the way in?! What can I say? I walk with purpose. Perhaps we'll try the other branch for swimming this afternoon, but I think I'll call to make sure it's open first.

Last night I had a dream that my tour buddy Devin and I were on a gold medal winning Olympic hockey team. (I don't remember which country we were playing for.) We had rehearsal for a show that night (apparently after we'd won the medals), so we wore them to rehearsal. We were the most badass drummer & keyboardist EVER.

It actually feels like spring this week! Our trusty outdoor thermometer is currently showing 60 degrees and it's sunny and amazing. This makes me gleeful!

I love that Elmo's pet fish is named Dorothy. Cracks me up.

Two of my online 'Mom Friends' (Colleen & Meredith) are running a 15K this weekend. They're my heroes.

Elephunk's mini-me has been named Elephink. :)

My cousin Matt and his wife own a cupcake business in Brooklyn. Not sure why I torture myself (and you guys!), but here's some of their latest flavors:

'Chocolate Turtle': Chocolate cake w/salted caramel buttercream, candied pecans, ganache & caramel drizzle

'Butterbeer': Vanilla cake soaked w/homemade butterscotch, butterscotch buttercream & edible gold dust

'Chocolate Grasshopper': Mint chocolate-chocolate chip cake w/mint buttercream and crushed chocolate

Note: I feel like I should go work out again after just typing all of that!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-10T18:47:00.000-05:00

Baby (Running) Steps

2010-03-09T21:28:00.003-05:00

Last week I started (loosely) following the Couch To 5K running program. The goal of the program is to get anyone up and running a 5K (equivalent to 30 minutes) in 9 weeks.

I've never been an athlete, much less a runner. Since joining the Y a month ago, however, I've been making a concerted effort to get to the gym at least 4 days a week. Michael, Max and I passed around sickness for a week (this was two weeks ago) and I didn't get to the gym at all. I'd been on a pretty good 'roll' at that point and had a bit of trouble getting back into the swing of things after the sickness lifted. I think I more or less just tried to do too much too soon. My friend Anne recommended switching between 1 min of walking and 1 min of running and it was definitely the key! (I didn't know it at the time, but this routine was the first week of C25K.) The first day of it ended up being one of my best workouts ever. I felt so strong and didn't dread looking at the clock to switch to running anymore!

This week was the start of Week 2 of the program. Having asked some running friends (read: friends who can run waaay longer than I can!) for their advice, I decided to repeat the Week 1 because I was feeling so good about it. I won't be crying if I'm not running a 5K in 9 weeks and am not putting limitations on myself in that respect, so I didn't have any problems with repeating the 1 min run/walk intervals.

Tonight I realized that though I'd love to have a partner to work out with eventually, it's probably best that I do it on my own right now because I'm my own worst enemy. (This can be both good and bad) Only a couple minutes into my warm-up I thought "I don't know if I can do this today", but kept going because heck, I was already at the gym and ON the treadmill. I planned to do 30 min of 1min run/walk, but then started feeling guilty that I wasn't going to make any 'progress' this week unless I went either a) longer or b) faster. So I ended up doing 35min of 1:30min run and 1min walk. I always psych myself out, but then end up feeling really good by about 20 min. I almost went for 40min, but decided to not push the envelope.

So although I spend a lot of my workouts 'arguing' with myself, I'm also allowing myself to think happy thoughts! I'm proud that...

- I've been doing the equivalent of running at least 1 mile each day (+ walking) and that my legs are tightening up
- Even though it sometimes takes mentally beating myself up, that I haven't given up and gotten off the treadmill on the days I feel like I can't do it
- I can now run for the longest lengths of time in years, even if it's with a minute of walking in between

Next up: conquering my fear of running in the great outdoors and not having the clock on the treadmill to rely on!

Pinch Hitter

2010-03-05T20:45:00.002-05:00

One of my college roommates, Calley, gave Max the big stuffed elephant (above) as a gift when he was born. 'Elephunk' has since become his comfort toy. One night a couple months ago we stayed at my brother-in-law's place, but forgot Elephunk at Nana's house an hour away. We tried to put Max down to bed (hoping he'd forget), but he wasn't having it. Not without my elephant! Michael finally ended up driving back to retrieve it and as soon as he walked back in the front door and picked Max up, he was asleep on his shoulder. Elephunk's selling point is that he has a tail that Max can hold as he sucks his thumb.

Shortly after that event, I broke down and asked Cal where she'd gotten the elephant in hopes of getting a 'back up'. Unfortunately, the store no longer sold them. Max & I were at Barnes & Noble this afternoon and found the smaller elephant above in the kids section. His eyes lit up as soon as he saw it, so I checked the texture (same as Elephunk's! And it has a tail!) and the rest was history. Little Dude was thrilled.

Finally! We have another elephant to keep Max distracted so we can wash Elephunk! Now we just need to name the little one... Phunkarella? Ella?

18 Months

2010-03-05T09:52:00.003-05:00

Can it be that Mister Man is really a year and a half old today?! We're celebrating with homemade cheese muffins. :)

Beautiful Blogger & Sunshine Award

2010-02-28T21:08:00.005-05:00

I have been fortunate to have made some awesome internet 'Mom Friends' over the past year or so. They've been so supportive, have made me laugh and have basically been a daily part of my life. I'm so honored to have been nominated for two 'awards' by two of them recently: 'The Beautiful Blogger Award' by my sassy friend Lu and 'The Sunshine Award' by one of the sweetest ladies around, Terrie. Thank you so much, gals!

Here’s how it works…

1. Thank the person who nominated me for this award.
2. Copy the award & place it on my blog.
3. Link to the person who nominated me for this award.
4. Share 7 interesting things about myself.
5. Nominate 7 other beautiful & sunshiney bloggers. (These awards are very similar, so I'm more or less mashing them together!)

So here we go with my 'Super 7'...

1) I used to be on a PBS TV show called 'Storylords' when I was in elementary school. I was one of the featured 'classroom regulars' on every episode and my husband, siblings and friends like to tease me that I was the know-it-all who always raised her hand and looked like she wanted to yell "Me! Me! Pick me, teacher!" We filmed on weekends at an elementary school in my hometown. The 'teacher' actually ended up being my Senior Composition teacher in high school. My character's name was originally supposed to be 'Amy', but seeing as this woman was a friend of the family and already knew me, she kept calling me 'Angie'. They finally just changed it.

2) Continuing on with the 'Storylords Factoids': it's still being shown in classrooms nationwide. (Why, I'll never know, but what they hey!) Funny story- my youngest brother, who is 10 years younger than me, saw the show when he was in elementary school. We had apparently not told him about my previous life as an actress (HA!), so imagine his surprise when he saw me on the screen and was like "Dude! That's my SISTER! What? That's my SISTER?!"

3) My parents bought the rights to get VHS tapes made of the whole series for my 21st birthday. It was way cool and I still have them, though Michael has since converted them to DVD.

4)
Be sure to check out a fabulous hair flip @ 7:15 (DIVA!) and an even more fabulous squeaky adolescent voice @ 8:46.

5) Equally embarrassing, I was cast as King Richard the Lion-Hearted in a junior high production of Robin Hood. Yes, King Richard the MAN. I distinctly remember some BS about how I was 'so versatile' and could therefore play a MAN, but really? I was in 8th grade and was not only playing a MAN, but was costumed in black leggings and a GUNNY SACK with a big red cross on the front. (Wait, it gets better!) During one of the dreaded daytime performances for the whole junior high, while playing a MAN, said GUNNY SACK (which was, mind you, a bit too tight) tore. I can still hear the tear and remember the panic setting in as I realized that I would soon be standing in front of my peers in nothing but leggings. At least I was saving the day...

6) I started taking piano lessons when I was about 8. I was very proud to pick Percussion as my instrument in elementary school band because it was suggested that you already have a year of piano. (Read: I thought I was pretty cool. Was I? Not really.) In 8th grade, my band director asked me to switch to French Horn, which I then learned and played through college, although I couldn't today for the life of me! I took a short stint of organ lessons in high school, but never really stuck with it. Probably because my legs were so short. :) I was a classical piano performance major in college, though I never had any intentions of becoming a concert pianist.

7) If you've read any other posts on this blog, this is probably quite obvious: my family and friends are my life. I'm fiercely loyal. And thanks to the wonders of modern technology, I've been fortunate to have made some amazing new friends (like Lu & Terrie) that I will hopefully one day meet in person!

My 7 nominees are:

1 & 2) The obvious- Lu from Jaded Perspective & Terrie from MiMi Needs Meds. Lu is one of the strongest people I know and makes me laugh on a daily basis. One of the things I love most about our friendship is that we can go from talking about something totally serious to completely riding the Silly Train within minutes. Ms. Terrie is straight-up tenderheartedness and is so loving and supportive. She's always there with kind words and wisdom.

3) Colleen from The Mess Potential is Exponential- I've talked about this amazing friend here before! After getting to know each other we came to realize that we have a real life link! She taught karate to a friend of mine from high school. Hello, Small World! Besides being one of my favorite people around, Colleen is also a huge inspiration in my attempts to get back in shape. She just ran almost 10 miles yesterday! Colleen is mom to two beautiful boys.

4) Katie from Why Bother?- Katie is mom to Jake (who turned 4 today- Happy birthday, Jake!) and is also one of my favorite workout inspirations. I love my daily conversations with her!

5) Kim from Cup of Creativi-Tea- Kim is the lone member on this list that I actually know in real life! We met 11 whole years ago while doing summerstock theatre in upstate New York. Kimmy worked in the costume shop and I was Ass't Musical Director. We lived in girls half of the 'techie' house and spent many an evening up on the roof laughing and having wonderful chats. Some of my favorite memories! Kim is mom to two kiddos- one girl and a newborn boy.

6) Becky from Life Out of Focus- Mom to two gorgeous girls (seriously, check out the pics on her blog!), Beck is yet another amazingly supportive and fun friend. She's also a fabulous photographer- again, check out the pics on her blog!

7) Cara from Momma Says- I'm sending lots 'o love to Cara tonight, as her two adorable kiddos are sick sick sick today and she could really use some rest. I love talking to Cara- she's down to earth and hilarious.

Thank you for being you, friends! I love you!
-A

Back in the Saddle

2010-02-24T23:58:00.003-05:00

I've been on a hiatus from my career as a musical director/keyboardist since the Maxster was born, but jumped back into the saddle this week when I started rehearsals the reading of a new musical. The show is part of the Penn State New Musical Theatre Festival. It's a pop/rock piece called 'Steam', set in 1960's Brooklyn and based on 'A Midsummer Night's Dream'.

The show was written and premiered in Denmark. I had the pleasure of spending a lot of one-on-one time on Sunday-Tuesday with the composer, as she was here for the first two days of rehearsal. She's insanely talented, down to Earth and just an all around fantastic person. It was so fun to work through the score with her and take note of all of her intentions. I have the supreme honor and responsibility of seeing that her music is performed exactly the way she wants it. It's exciting, diverse and frankly, I get to rock out. :) She and the three gentlemen who conceived and wrote the book will be back in three weeks for the final days of rehearsal and then the performances, which is very exciting.

I've done three original shows in the past and this one is proving to be just as exciting. I love doing new pieces and the 'ready for anything-ness' that goes along with the territory. And honestly, it's also just really nice to be doing a show again. I'm realizing in just a few days of rehearsal that I really do miss it!

On a side note, I just found out this afternoon that one of the lead females in the show just got off a tour in Asia with three good friends of mine. One was my assistant in summerstock in NY (and then went on to music direct a tour of the Christmas Carol musical I composed), and I've toured twice! with the other two. Talk about a small world! I love it. :)

A Random Act of Kindness

2010-02-15T13:00:00.004-05:00

I almost cried at the gym today. And not because I'd pushed myself to the limit (I had) and was tired (I was).

Max and I have developed an awesome daily routine. We get up, have breakfast, play, and get dressed. Then we head to the gym. One of the glories of the Y is that they provide free childcare. Hello, no excuse to not work out daily! As I've mentioned before, this is also good for Max's socialization and Mommy's putting her little boy in the care of others. Though it's further away, we've been going to the bigger branch near the university because it not only has longer morning daycare hours, but also has morning swimming hours. (The branch seven minutes up the road from us only has 3-3:50pm swimming.)

We swim every day for about a half hour or so, pending Max's mood. He's become quite the center of attention in the therapy pool, as the majority of the people in it are upwards of 65 years old. The same bunch of people are usually in the pool at the same time. The other day he was surrounded by no less than 4 elderly people and one of them was talking to him in a Donald Duck voice. He loves the attention and they love his smiles and laughs. Win win for everyone! So anyway, they all know Max and he at least recognizes them. (I think.)

After our swim we go back to the locker room and I get Max dressed, then put him in his umbrella stroller and give him a snack while I get dressed. I've been walking/running on the treadmill every day after our swim, so that's when I take Max to the childcare room. (Where I might add that he is also very popular- all of the babysitters know him by name and gush all over him.)

It's been nice to be able to take the time to shower/dry my hair/etc after my workout each day. Kind of some 'me' time, even if it's just getting ready. Today as I was getting dressed one of the women from the pool stopped me and said "I can tell you're the best mom in the world". I was so touched and thanked her. (Mind you, I was a little uncomfortable that she was all up in my grill while I was half naked.) She stepped even closer and said "You know how I can tell?". "How?" I asked. "Because I've been watching you in the pool and in this locker room and your son exudes such happiness and you can just tell that he adores you."

I almost cried. (Yes, half naked cried.) It was so kind of her to take the time to tell me. Now I'm inspired to perform my own random acts of kindness. Preferably clothed random acts of kindness. :)

Will You Be Mine?

2010-02-14T21:00:00.004-05:00

I love to grocery shop if only for the happiness that Max brings to other shoppers lives.

This afternoon we went to Wegmans, one of my favorite grocery stores in the whole United States. (Colleen can back me up on this one, right?!) Max was wearing the ridonkulously adorable outfit you see above. It's a Nittany Lion get-up that his Uncle Dave (a Penn State alum) got him for Christmas. It was way too big at the time, but we recently realized that it now fits perfectly.

Having had a glorious two hour morning nap, Max was in chipper spirits. He was grinning and waving to any and everyone in the store. I lost count of how many people stopped their carts to talk to him, gush and compliment his outfit. He responded with laughs and more smiles.

The piece de resistance was when a woman asked if he'd be her valentine. He looked her in the eye and proceeded to blow her a kiss and flash his enormous dimples. It was truly priceless.

And yes, I do realize that we're going to be in BIG trouble when this little flirt is a teenager!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Just Because...

2010-02-11T21:12:00.003-05:00

I mean, really. How can you not melt at the sight of this little super hero?!

It's fun to stay at the...

2010-02-09T19:49:00.007-05:00

We decided to use some Christmas/Birthday/Anniversary money towards a membership to the local YMCA and I dare say it's one of the best investments we've ever made! It's our goal to get back in shape, lose baby weight and be around for our boy for a long long time.

Max & I met Michael for a swimming date on Sunday afternoon. He'd been working on school stuff at the studio all weekend and was in need of a break. We'd gotten the membership earlier in the week, but this was the first time we'd actually used it. The larger branch in town has both an Olympic sized swimming pool as well as a smaller therapy pool, which is where we can take Max. He seemed a little scared at first, but eventually warmed up to it. Our boy is a water baby, so we'll be making good use of the pool!

Yesterday Max and I went swimming at the branch closer to our house and had a blast! It's a smaller pool and there was only one other person in it. He laughed, splashed, dunked his head under the water, kicked and enjoyed screeching and hearing his voice echo throughout the room. I headed back last night after he was in bed to work out and am proud to report that I walked 1.5 miles on the treadmill, but actually did 4 spurts of running as well. (I can't recall the last time I've actually run, so this was a big step!)

Today we headed back to the larger Y and Max stayed in the daycare room while I worked out. (Free daycare! Does it get any better?!) Leaving him there was a necessary step for me, as I'm a worrywart and don't like leaving him. He's growing up so quickly though and I know that socialization is important. But did I mention I worry? ;) So anyway, he (of course) loved it and didn't even notice when I left the room! When I went back to retrieve him, he was all smiles and the babysitters said he was so happy and playful. He (naturally) blew them kisses as we left to go swimming. As you can see, the little man zonked out on the ride home and even let me put him in his crib (without fully waking) and then took a 2.5 hour nap!

We're definitely going to make good use of our membership!

Move over, Junior...

2010-01-18T23:51:00.004-05:00

One of my favorite toys at my grandparent's house was an old plastic harmonica. I would play that thing in the whinny-breath-in-and-out manner that I'm sure drove everyone in the house bonkers. Years later, I started playing in earnest. I still get out when I can to open blues jams.

Anyway, awhile back, I played for Max. At first, he cried. So I tried a few months later. He chewed on it. So I waited again until tonight. My, what a difference...

I'm looking forward to the day when he and I will hit the clubs and tear it up.

I love being a Dad...

4 Years

2010-01-06T20:05:00.011-05:00

Today is our 4 year wedding anniversary! We met 9 years ago, started dating 7 years ago and have now officially been married longer than we dated. Boo-ya! To avoid typing the same ol' thing every year (and you *know* I will!), I've uploaded pics this time around. Feel free to visit here for last year's recap of the best day of our lives.

Happy Anniversary, babe! You're the love of my life, the father of my child and the most upstanding person I know. I'm proud to be your wife. I love you today, tomorrow and always.

Max's New Buddy

2009-12-27T21:33:00.006-05:00

Nana continued her tradition of making life-sized dolls for the boys and introduced Max to his this Christmas. The tradition is that it will be named whatever Max chooses and can say. (So it's yet to be named, though it looks like it's leaning towards an 'A' name.)

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T11:09:00.002-05:00

We hope everyone has a day filled with family, friends, good food and safe travels!

80's Keys

2009-12-23T13:42:00.006-05:00

We found my old Casio PT-100 keyboard in the storage unit yesterday. We're talking old school! I loved this keyboard growing up for it's awesomely cheesy rhythm banks (Bossa Nova was my fave) and synthesized strings, perfect for playing Axel F. We decided to load it up with fresh batteries for Max and the boy LOVES it!

We also found Max a Christmas church outfit last night. Mommy was *very* excited to have him try it on this morning and accidentally stuck both of his little legs in one. (Whoops, my bad!)

Olympic Dreams

2009-12-21T16:00:00.003-05:00

Last night was the second night in a row I dreamt very vividly that I was an Olympic swimmer. (The difference in last night's dream vs the first night's was that it's soundtrack was by Mannheim Steamroller.) The Penn State women's volleyball coach was our coach and he decided to put me into a relay at the very last minute. I was all "Put me in, Coach! I can do it!" and was jumping up and down raising my hand like a fifth grader trying to be called on in class. He finally said "You're in!" and told me to get going. He didn't tell me what stroke I was swimming in the relay, which freaked me out. I kept trying to ask the other swimmers what I was supposed to do, but no one answered, so I figured I'd just figure it out when I got up on the starting block.

I was also wearing a very Mom-ish moo moo type swimsuit, so I didn't match the other swimmers in their sleek racing suits. *sigh* Such is life...

It turns out I was to race the breaststroke leg of the relay, which was a huge relief because it's my breast (I mean, BEST) stroke. HA! HA! (I used to be on swim team in junior high for real, yo.) The rest of the story goes downhill from here. I did my laps and did okay, but we didn't win. I remember being very proud to hear the National Anthem played, though. I think I cried with pride. I mean, I was an OLYMPIAN.

I guess that's probably how it is for real Olympians. I'll just stick to dreaming. :)

White Christmas

2009-12-20T20:32:00.006-05:00

It looks like we're going to have a White Christmas after all! Max enjoyed his first sled ride yesterday immensely!

Random Tidbits

2009-12-15T10:55:00.007-05:00

I'm trying to pass time away as we wait to hear the results of Michael's latest CT scan, so I thought I'd blog out a bunch of random things I've been meaning to write about...

Max is proving to be the little jokester. The other day we were sitting on the floor watching Sesame Street and he was eating a cracker. He got up and walked behind me to play peek-a-boo and then reached out to feed me what I thought was a piece of the cracker. I bit into it and realized it was actually a teeny piece of PAPER. I pulled it out of my mouth and he threw his head back and laughed as if to say "Ha! Sucker!"

Max & I attended a church dinner with Nana last week and I think it's safe to say he was a hit. He charmed everyone and their mothers. Everyone at our table was amazed at his mad utensil using skills and kept commenting on how well adjusted he was and how he doesn't put on a 'show', he's just *that* happy and pleasant. (I was very proud.) After the dinner there was a little concert of Christmas music by an all ladies barbershop group. One of the ladies at our table really wanted to see Max walk, so I put him down as they were assembling to begin. He walked away to the next table (of strangers), stood beween them and greeted them. One of the ladies picked him up... and the concert began. It then became apparent to me that my child was not going to be sitting with me during the show. Hilarious! He stayed with that lady for awhile, then got down and started walking amongst the other surrounding tables. Thankfully, no one was annoyed with a little guy toddling around and kept trying to reach out to get him to stop so THEY could pick him up. I counted and he made contact with no less than a dozen people during the concert! We'll obviously have to teach him about 'strangers' eventually, but it was really heartwarming to see everyone's faces light up when he walked over to them.

Our latest trick is blowing kisses. And yes, he blew kisses as we said goodbye to people at the dinner. :) He also waves to people from the grocery cart. Oy, what have we started?! To quote my husband: "All three of us have nasty head colds. This is retribution for having a flirtatious son...a.k.a...."germ magnet".

This past Friday night I went to the Penn State Santa Crawl with some of Michael's classmates. The Crawl consisted of at least 50 people dressed up in holiday garb- as Santa, elves, or in my case, a reindeer. (I picked the reindeer headband because it made Max laugh when I tried it on in the store.) My favorite Santas of the evening were a Chef Santa (complete with the huge tall hat), a 60-something Boston Marathon Santa (he'd actually run it), and a Run DMC Santa. The girls and I had dinner before the crawl and then joined in at the second bar. There was a huge hollowed-out sleigh and as we walked to each establishment people would 'ride' (walk) in it. The most hilarious part was that they would bike lock it to a pole outside each bar! The whole thing was very festive and jolly and I was surprisingly pleased that it wasn't 'cliquey'- it was just a bunch of strangers & friends dressed in funny outfits celebrating the season. I joked with the girls that I was flattered that they thought I still had what it took to do a bar crawl (they're all anywhere from 4-10 years younger than this old girl) and that I'd probably only make it for one or two stops before heading home. Surprisingly, I made it for 4 or 5 and stayed out till midnight! Whoo-hoo, party animal. ;) It's fun though because not only are they a super fun bunch of girls, but one of them is also a mother of a 2 year old, so we have something in common. We joked that it was 'Momma's Night Out'. All in all, it was a blast and I'm really glad I went. Probably will next year too if they're up for it! (Above photo courtesy of Taran!)

Sunday night Michael and I attended the annual Theatre Department Christmas party at one of his professor's homes. Also a great time- good food, drinks and friends. My favorite part of the evening was when a complete stranger saw us talking and commented that we 'looked like newlyweds'! It'll actually be four years next month!

UPDATE!!! Michael just called from Hershey: the previous lumps that were found at the last scan have NOT grown! His oncologist will continue checking in on him every three months, but he continues to be CANCER FREE!!!

Time for me to go throw up in relief.

Chores

2009-12-10T12:05:00.001-05:00

Nana had a chore for Max this week. He helped her clean out her tupperware cupboard so she could sort the bowls/lids. In turn, he got to play in a fun little cubby!

Good News, and Some Thoughts

2009-12-03T00:22:00.003-05:00

First off, we got news today that Aunt Jean's surgery went very well today. If the next 48 hours go well (and theses are the diciest hours of the the procedure) then Jean will be moved to the neuro wing of the hospital, which a a very good thing. Thank you for all your well wishes and prayers. This has been a torturous year for Allan and Jean, and we hope that the news will only get better for them from this point forward.

On another note, I noticed that NY state legislature voted down a bill that would allow gay marriage. As I read several stories on the subject, I found myself reading the "comments" section underneath the articles. I have my own views on the subject, which I'll get to later, but what amazes me is the hostile dialogues people will engage in. No one can hear what the other person is saying. I've never known a problem so dangerous it can't be talked about, but I believe we have lost the ability to have a thoughtful, respectful, and meaningful debate in this country. People (I can be included in this group) are quick to anger, quick to take offense, and as a result, nothing gets done. No points of views are shared. I don't know the solution. I think listening is involved, but I know it's hard for me to listen when the first thing I hear is something I totally disagree with. I shut down. I think "horse feathers" (okay, not really, but this is a "G" rated blog)and think of the first condescending, nasty thing I can say. What is the solution? For my part, I need to listen more. I'm not the "end all, be all" of knowledge. Do I think I'm right? Of course! And maybe that's why I should shut up and listen. At the very least, I'll be able to understand what the other person values, and then maybe I can be respectful of that and have a meaningful dialogue. Will the other person be as respectful? I hope so, but experience (and 100,000 blog posts) say otherwise.

That being said, I was disappointed the measure didn't pass. I'm not sure I fully understand the reason behind the defeat and the rallying cry of opposition which, to my understanding is, marriage is between a man and a woman because that's how God wants it, or because that's the natural way of nature. I respect a person's right to believe in any faith they chose. For my part, as a Unitarian Universalist, I believe in a concept of God that is accepting and loving, even of the things that I don't understand or fear. Homosexuality is not the typical orientation in nature, but it is of nature.. It is found in nature, and not just in our species. But that being said, marriage is at the center of the argument (though I have my suspicions that there is a larger issue at hand). My definition, based on my experience, is that marriage is between three entities. Traditionally, it's been a man, a woman, and the state that demands $50 to provide them the marriage certificate. Did my wife believe that I loved her before we got married or after? I'm going to hazard a guess and say "Before", just 'cause I'm an optimist. I made a commitment to her long before I proposed. The marriage ceremony was for us, too. We didn't invite the state, because we felt the state would have other things to do that day, and frankly, I would have been surprised if it did show up. The only thing that is different between my wife and I and our homosexual friends who are in committed relationships is that Angie and I get certain legal benefits from the state, and our homosexual friends don't. And to me, that's unacceptable. If the church wants to deny marriage to people who are homosexual, that's their prerogative. There are many Christian congregations that will allow marriage ceremonies between same-sex couples. Perhaps if it were called something else for legal purposes, like "Maniage", or "Femiage" when applied to gay and lesbian couples and "Heterioge" when a man and woman get hitched, and "marriage" when the church is involved, the problem might resolve itself?

Probably not. But it's nice to dream. I understand that separating one's faith from one's politics is almost impossible to do. I guess what I'd like to hear is a good legal reason to deny same-sex couples the opportunity to enter in a state recognized marriage. Of course, that statement inherently implies that the reason must be "good" in my eyes as well as the person who provides it. Very unfair of me, I know, but that's the fly in the ointment, as it were.

Prayer Request

2009-12-01T20:46:00.004-05:00

Hi everyone,

Thoughts, prayers, positive vibes or whatever you may subscribe to would be appreciated for my Aunt Jean (and Uncle Allan) tomorrow morning. It has been almost a year since she was the victim of a horrible hit-and-run in Brooklyn.

To assure I give the correct information for your prayers, here's a bit of info sent to me by my uncle:

"The surgery date is exactly 50 weeks since her first surgery after the accident. The surgery procedure is called cranioplasty and will take a little over three hours. During the surgery the two surgeons will implant the "flap" that was made by a computer with a digital scan of her head. The flap is designed to exactly fit the opening where she has no skull. (Note: she has been wearing a helmet to protect her brain all year) There are some serious risks with the surgery, but it is not an option to not have the implant. After the surgery, if all goes well, they project that she will have loss of function, both motor skills as well as cognitive skills. Jean will start rehab as soon as possible."

So, as you can see, there's obviously a long road ahead. Jean & Allan are amazing people and every single good thought to help strengthen & sustain them through this journey will be very much appreciated. Thank you!

Toddler Steps

2009-11-28T21:23:00.011-05:00

We took a semi-mobile toddler to Nana's house for Thanksgiving and came back with a walker! Max took his first 'real' steps on his own last Tuesday and has been testing the waters since. (He even showed his physical therapist his mad skillz that Friday!) We predicted that he'd be walking steadily by the time we came back home after a week away. Throughout the week he started walking more and more each day (at least attempting to walk more than crawl anyway), and this morning he TOOK OFF. As soon as he woke up he was all about walking from here to there. Mind you, he's not running marathons or anything, but the Boy is mobile! We half-joked this week that we're kind of glad that our current apartment is so tiny vs Nana & Dave's houses. (LOTS to get into! So much room to roam!) The little man proved us right as soon as we walked back in this afternoon. Here, there, everywhere! He's truly the master of the house now. (And we couldn't be prouder.)

We had a relaxing and delicious holiday. Max started eating huge meals starting Thanksgiving lunch and hasn't stopped since. He visited his Uncle Dave in Pittsburgh twice and got to see his 'pet fish'. (Ahem, the fish that may or MAY live in Dave's aquariums.) A big highlight was last night- Max made his Nana's millennium! As Michael was getting ready to take him to bed, Nana said to Max "Night, night!" and Max responded "Naht naht!"

National Adoption Month

2009-11-20T11:02:00.005-05:00

"November is National Adoption month, a month set aside to raise awareness about the adoption of children and youth from foster care." (Description borrowed from the Child Welfare Information Gateway website)

I am an international adoptee, as are my three siblings. My sister and I were adopted from Korea and my two brothers from India. We were adopted by our incredible parents and had an awesome childhood growing up in the midwest. To our knowledge, we were all 'products' of orphanages overseas, so although we were not in foster care (as is the topic of National Adoption Month), I felt compelled to write today about my experience with adoption in general.

I have never been overly interested in my past until last spring when I asked my parents for my adoption records. There was something about being pregnant with my first child and realizing that I didn't know anything about my genetics or what my early months were like. The information in the file was very interesting. After all these years, it was kind of neat to know little things:

- I was 12 lbs and listed in fair health when abandoned at the orphanage
- When my diaper was wet or I was scolded (even in a joking manner), I 'fretted'
- I was in a crib of sorts with 6 (whoa, six!) other babies
- A note in the summary/recommendations: "Hope she can be taken care of with deep love"

My siblings and I were about as 'American' as they come. I remember being offended growing up when one of my dad's friends referred to us as "The Tribe". Or amused when a lady at church asked my parents "when they were going to tell us that we were adopted". Really?! Like our differing skin color wasn't clue enough? Hilarious.

In any case, my parents were always open about our adoption and facilitated ways for us to learn more about our cultures. I have many happy memories of times visiting the Festival of Nations in St. Paul, MN. FON was held at a huge convention center and featured all kinds of displays, music/dance concerts and food booths from many countries. We were able to try Korean food, as well as Indian. (Although I'd venture to say we all gravitated to the WI cheese curds!) I'd like to return someday, it was a jolly good time.

One summer, my brother and I even attended a Korean Culture Camp at the Minnehaha Academy. (Yes, me and my Indian brother.) One of the things I remember most was: damn, there were a lot of Koreans there! Growing up in our small town, my siblings and I were in the relative minority, so suddenly being surrounded by Koreans! Everywhere! was a new concept. We took classes in language and dance and ate Korean meals. (Much to the chagrin of my husband, to this day I do NOT like kimchi.)

Back to us being 'Americanized', I remember feeling really out of place at the camp. Perhaps this was because many kids attended summer after summer and already knew a bulk of everyone in their age groups. It just felt 'clique-ish' and frankly, I thought "What's the big fat hairy deal?" My point being though was that we were fortunate that our parents gave us the opportunities to learn more about our cultures. The sky was the limit as far as they were concerned.

And as for the hopes of my "being taken care of with deep love", heck yeah. Couldn't ask for better parents! I hope that every child, be it in the foster system or orphanages (here and overseas) can be as fortunate as my siblings and I were- to be adopted into a loving and nurturing family.

Thanks, Mom & Dad.

Fight For Preemies Day

2009-11-17T13:00:00.008-05:00

Max entered the world when he was 31 weeks and 6 days. In addition to his prematurity, he was born with the eColi gram rod negative virus. He was not expected to survive.

He's a miracle.

November is Prematurity Awareness Month and today, Nov. 17, is Fight For Preemies Day. Please please please visit here to see what you can do to help these little guys and girls. I pray for the day that every premature baby can have Max's miracle ending.

UPDATE: Our boy took his first steps on his own today! He was very proud of himself and his mom, of course, got teary eyed. There's no turning back now!

Thankfulness

2009-11-14T16:02:00.005-05:00

This morning during Max's nap I copied and pasted all of our Carepages posts and the comments left for us into Word docs. Seeing as his entrance into the world was so early, many of the 'normal' things you'd put into a baby book require rather lengthy explanations, so we're going to assemble a separate NICU Album of the posts Michael and I wrote, as well as pictures we posted on Max's Carepage site during our 30 days there. I took the time to notate certain things that an adult Max might not know and/or might want to know down the road. (i.e. who some of the commenters were and their relation to us, what certain short posts meant, etc.) I hope that one day he'll enjoy/appreciate having a comprehensive 'documentation' of his start in life.

While reading some of the posts again was very difficult, I'm really thankful that we wrote them and thus, 14 months later, are able to print them out for posterity. It also makes looking at our thriving boy in person even more incredible- the little peanut who gave us the scare of our life is now just shy of 20 pounds!

I was also touched once again by the support and love we received in comments from family, friends and even strangers! For those of you who are still reading this blog and commented- THANK YOU! They meant so much to us. Going back to our room at the Ronald McDonald House to write and/or read comments after a long day in the NICU always cheered us up. For so long, it was our contact with the outside world. We are so thankful to have had such amazing support during our journey there.

Even after Max came home with us, we continued posting on Carepages now and then, particularly when Michael was diagnosed with cancer and after my Aunt Jean was a victim of a hit-and-run last December. The support continued and we are forever grateful. Hard to believe it's been a whole year since all of this happened!

Two Candles

2009-11-11T19:14:00.005-05:00

Today Madeline Alice Spohr would have blown out two candles. My thoughts have been with her Heather and Mike all day. The world wide web will always remember and celebrate your life, Maddie!

Please take a moment to visit Friends of Maddie, a charity created in memory of Maddie to provide support to families of NICU babies. Having spent an extended amount of time in the NICU ourselves, this is a cause I fully support.

On a side note, today has also been a day to celebrate and honor our veterans. I'm a proud sister, daughter and granddaughter! Thank you, Eric, Dad & Buddy!

Inspired

2009-10-31T00:57:00.011-04:00

I just got home from a date with myself to see the Michael Jackson movie, 'This Is It'. It was, in a word, amazing. Michael & Max are both asleep, but I can't sleep yet- I'm still jittery and 'electrified'.

I grew up listening to MJ music and have many happy memories of it. My Mom would often have church-related meetings on Wednesday nights, so it would be Dad and the four of us kids at home. We had the Thriller LP and Dad would blast it at ridonkulous decibels and we'd dance around. The fun of it was that we were 'being bad' by (literally) shaking the house! (And on a school night?! What?!) I remember TONS of laughter. Our favorites were 'Beat It' and 'Thriller' and to this day, I smile whenever I hear them. Our dance parties would often end with Mom driving into the driveway, the stereo being turned off and us running to our rooms and into bed as if nothing out of the ordinary had been going on. But she knew. Oh yes, she knew. So did the neighbors. *tehee*

I'd planned to see the movie with our friend Amanda, but couldn't get ahold of her, so I went by myself. (Don't worry Amanda, I will TOTALLY go again with you! For real!) It was a late night showing and there were 12 people in the theatre including myself. The thing that amazed me the most was that NO ONE moved at all during the whole movie. I completely rocked out the whole time! I guess it's the musician in me- it was impossible to stay still. I was hooked (line and sinker!) within minutes. This was definitely a movie to be seen in Dolby Surround Sound.

Coming from a theatre background, it was like watching an extreme behind the scenes tech rehearsal and it really made me miss my (currently on hiatus) career, but inspired me to get back to it eventually once Max is older. I'm a huge fan of modern rock musical theatre and watching the movie reminded me of one of the most exciting shows I've ever conducted- The Who's Tommy- at a theatre in Boston. We (the six piece rock band) were placed on platforms about 8 or 9 feet in the air onstage and it was the closest thing to a 'rock star moment' I'll ever have. (see pic- I was on the right hand platform with my drummer & bassist) The show starred Jake Simpson (a two time Star Search winner) as Tommy and whoa, could he wail. (He was also an incredibly sweet and humble human being. Bonus.) It was like playing a rock concert every night for a month. THRILLING.

But I digress. One of the things that impressed me most was that it was very obvious that MJ was actually singing during the rehearsals. He did 'mark' to save his voice now and then, but there was none of the tracked lip synching stuff that goes on with so many pop artists these days. He also marked some of the dances, but it was brilliant even when he was doing so. Seeing him marking next to his posse of back-up dancers (who were going full-out) was incredible- he made it look so easy and flawless, even when it wasn't at performance level.

He was quite obviously a perfectionist and though not bossily, coached everyone from his musicians to dancers. One of my favorite 'scenes' was his coaching of his musical director on the intro of 'The Way You Make Me Feel'. He kept telling him to 'lay back' into the beat. It reminded me of an almost identical coaching I received from my mentor in college almost 10 years ago. "Lay back, Ange! Just LAY BACK. Easy!" (Love you, Hoff!) I also thought it was tres cool that he made it very clear to his MD that he wanted everything to sound exactly like the recordings. It's so easy to stray and be all 'artistic', but on songs as iconic as these, heck yeah! As an audience member, I wanted to hear exactly what I've been hearing in my head all these years. (On a side note: he had a kickass female electric guitarist named Orianthi in his band. ROCK, GIRL POWER!)

So in closing, I thought it was a fantastic documentary and would strongly recommend running (not walking!) to see it before it closes in theatres next week. Seeing the footage of 'Smooth Criminal', 'Beat It' and 'Thriller' was worth the price of admission alone, but you get SO much more. It's such a shame that MJ is no longer with us and was unable to present such an incredible work to the masses, but thank goodness this footage exists. It's really special.

P.S. Happy Halloween! Although we're not trick-or-treating, we're dressing Max up as Coach Tanaka (the football coach) from 'Glee'.

Making Progress

2009-10-28T10:54:00.002-04:00

Max is currently in a big imitating stage- both with words (kind of) and actions. As you can see above, one of his favorite activities is playing with pots and pans. We've conveniently baby proofed all of the kitchen cupboards, but every now and then I'll open one and let him loose. The other day I found him pretending to 'stir' the pot. Mere minutes later he was stuck in the oven drawer, but still insistent to continue practicing brushing his teeth! (another new hobby)

Max Attack @ The Gap!

2009-10-17T20:44:00.002-04:00

As I told some family & friends in an email earlier this evening, I never thought we'd be 'Those Parents', but yes, we've entered Miracle Max in the Gap Casting Call. *insert amused giggle here* Max & I were at the mall earlier today and I saw the contest website on Gap's window and noted it in my BlackBerry for viewing when we got home.

After checking it out and asking Michael (I wouldn't want us to get into a whole Jon & Kate fiasco- HA! HA!), I thought "What the heck?" and entered him. The kid likes to smile and is pretty photogenic. And without personal bias (okay, who am I kidding- we all know that would *never* be possible!), he's a pretty cute little guy.

Official 'judging' begins Oct. 23. During this time, the Top 20 finalists will be selected and featured in a professional Gap photo shoot. If he was selected to be in this Top 20, voting would continue Dec. 7-21. The top four kids (Baby Boy, Boy, Baby Girl, Girl) will be featured on the windows of BabyGap & Gap Kids in Feb 2010.

And a side note, the winner of this 'Fan Favorite Vote' will win a seven-day/six-night family vacation to either Turks & Caicos or Jamaica from Beaches Resorts - The Luxury Included® Family Vacation. I'll be straight- that would be RIDONKULOUSLY AWESOME. :)

So if you've got a spare minute or two, you can vote for him once daily (starting now!) until Nov. 17. Vote here!

(Max B, Baby Boy Category, ID #648176418)

P.S. Photo credit goes to my Dad, the infamous Stu Fu. Thanks, Dad!

Flying Nightmare

2009-10-16T14:38:00.006-04:00

Having flown with Max on multiple flights this summer, I was appalled when I learned of an internet friend's recent run-in with TSA agents while going through a checkpoint with her young son. (Nic's son was taken from her for a security check *out of her view*! Read her account here.)

When preparing for our very first flight together, I read everything possible on the TSA website so I made sure I knew what to expect. I particularly recall reading this and feeling relieved that Max would not be taken from me. I also remember feeling almost comforted, as it sounded like the agents were trained to be sensitive to children.

We were stopped before boarding our last (of six) flights. We were 'randomly' pulled out of line and they used the magic wand on both of us. At the time, I didn't think anything of it when they took Max and stood him on a table to scan him. But that's the difference between my experience and Nic's. They took her son not only away from her, but to a completely different location! I would have gone ape-sh*t had they taken Max.

I understand the need for intense airport security, but just thinking about what happened to Nic makes my blood boil! I've run into plenty of less than friendly TSA agents in my time, but it seems to me that she was treated *particularly* unfairly.

Grrr, TSA. Grrr!
--------
UPDATE:
It appears that there may be some discrepancy in Nic's blog/story. The TSA posted a response to her blog last night and included video that may or may not prove that 90% of her story was false. In my own opinion, it's really hard to say. Was the video edited? Perhaps. Does the TSA really have time to do something like that? Probably not. Do I feel duped? Yep. She has since posted a response on her blog, but surprisingly after spending a bulk of the day just plain confused by the whole situation, that was all I needed to move on. It was good to finally hear from HER. I wish you the best, Nic, and give you the benefit of the doubt. I hope that things get straightened out soon so you can move on as well.

ANOTHER UPDATE:
The TSA updated their site last night (10/18) with the video in it's entirety from all 9 camera angles. You really can't argue with it. I'm sad that it's come to this.

Dogs, Mr. Roboto & RAJ- oh my!

2009-10-14T19:34:00.007-04:00

Attention all theatre lovers, dog lovers, music lovers and RAJ lovers! (That's one of our dearest friends- Robert Anthony Jones- for those of you not in the know!)

Be sure to check out the brand spankin' new 101 Dalmations Musical, now open in Minneapolis at the Orpheum Theatre, then hitting the road on a national tour!

Direction is by theatre great Jerry Zaks, with a brand-new score by Dennis DeYoung (of STYX fame!), and featuring the aforementioned RAJ as Jinx, one of Cruella De Vil's henchmen!

(I'm going to admit something here. It wasn't until *just now* that I realized Cruella's last name spells DEVIL. Hi, I'm a little late to the party!)

Anyhoo, I can't say enough about what an amazing performer and friend Robert is- I've had the pleasure of working with him in 'both' capacities and I'm so so SO proud of him. Doing a brand new never-before-seen piece is always a huge rush and for him to get to do it at this scale thrills me to no end. GO SEE HIM! (We unfortunately have to wait until May! Grrr!)

P.S. There's apparently real dalmations in the grand finale! Dogs?! Doing tricks! Boo-ya! :)

Baby Nittany Lion to Boy Nittany Lion

2009-10-11T21:14:00.003-04:00

Lil' Stinker Strikes Again!

2009-10-08T22:11:00.002-04:00

So apparently the baby gate wasn't fully locked earlier today. I specifically 'hide' Bernie's food & water dishes behind the gate so Max can't get to them.

He got them.

I found him full on dunking for apples. It was very wet.

The End.

Sheet!

2009-10-06T21:49:00.009-04:00

We recently realized that Max has a 'sheet preference' and that change in said preference messes with his sleep patterns.

One night last week while I was bathing Max, Michael went to change the sheet in Max's crib. It was white with a speckled dot pattern. As he was changing it, he had an 'Ah-ha!' moment. (This kind of 'Ah-ha!', not this.) He noted aloud that Max had recently started waking up at least once in the middle of the night, which was very unlike him since our hard-earned victory in the Sleep Wars. As a designer, he knows to veer away from using blue, as it lulls people to sleep.

The previous bed sheet had been- you guessed it, BLUE. And Max had been sleeping like a champ... when he was on the BLUE sheet! (Coincidentally, just the previous evening my friend Betty had been talking about how she had the same fiasco with her daughter- changing from a solid pink sheet to pattern.)

So we went back to blue and wouldn't you know it? He's been sleeping like a... well, like a baby ever since! Ta-da!

Thanks for joining us in Adventures in Parenting 101. :)

One Year Ago

2009-10-05T12:18:00.016-04:00

One year ago today (and one month to the day of his birth) we said goodbye to the amazing staff at the Geisinger NICU and brought Max home! I'll never forget the feeling of taking him out into the sunshine and actually putting him into the car with us. We enjoyed our first day as a family at home with the guys watching a Steelers game... kind of. Max didn't watch the game last night, but he wore his Steelers gear to bed!

More Proud Mom Ramblings

2009-10-02T22:32:00.005-04:00

We're starting to work on using utensils at mealtime. It's messy. REAL messy.

One of Max's favorite shows is the Imagination Movers. I must admit that I've become quite a fan as well. They dance and sing catchy songs- think Teletubbies, only not creepy colored aliens. We originally tuned into them awhile ago because I found that they were a good distraction for when I was trying to change the squirmy worm's diaper. I don't know if it's the bold primary colors or music (probably a combination of both), but he's hooked. Without fail, he'll plant himself in front of the TV and watch until the half hour episode is finished! (see above) The same goes for our other favorite show (Handy Manny), which is really the only other show that we watch with regularity now that I think of it.

We like Manny because he's a fix-it guy (like Michael) and he carries around a toolbox of talking tools. Okay, and I'll fess up- I enjoy it because I always crack up whenever they make reference to the tools. (Because I'm obviously a mature... 12 year old.) "Hola, Manny! Hi, Tools!" See? Admit it- even *you* laughed. :)

The Boy has started giving hugs and kisses, or rather licks. When you ask him for a kiss (provided he's in the mood), he'll either peck his head back and forth and/or lick your cheek. I noticed him playfully licking my leg the other day and when I mentioned that I thought it was a little weird to Michael, he reminded me that it's an affectionate gesture on Max's part.

I'm still job hunting, but I'll admit it- I'm absolutely LOVING my time as a stay at home mom to Max! We have a great daily routine carved out and I'm just super happy and content being with him every day.

On a side note, he had his first of two flu shots earlier today. He was a champ and thankfully, has not had any side effects so far. He and Michael had fun 'rough housing' together after dinner tonight. The house was filled with laughs and squeals- I don't think I've ever heard him laugh that hard! I love to watch them roll around and play together. Michael is the BEST dad.

Being home with my guys = priceless.

P.S. A very happy birthday to our dear friend and Max's 'honorary Godfather', Brian! He gave Max the green shirt you see in the pic above- I couldn't get a good shot of it, but it says 'U of I Am Awesome'. Hilarious! Hope you had a fantastic day, B! We love you!

Update on the Maxster

2009-09-28T17:36:00.004-04:00

This past Friday Max's physical therapist told me that she's going to start doing the yearly testing at his next appointment, but that chances are, he *won't* qualify for PT anymore! :) A baby must be 25% lagged to qualify and he's *thisclose* to walking already. She said that she has another baby about Max's age (2 mos early) and he's nowhere near Max's development! (Um, yes- we're quite proud. Not that it's a 'Race of the Preemies', but you know what I mean.) She'll still do the testing and if he needs help in other areas, she'll recommend another therapist. It's bittersweet because Kathy has been with us since last November almost weekly. She's a wonderful lady and has (obviously!) really helped Max along. We'll miss her!

Max is taking a great interest in Bernie these days. Bernie is tolerating the extra unwanted attention pretty well so far. It just depends on his mood. Some days he's all over the attention, while on others he's not into the petting. (Max still doesn't have a grasp of his strength, so it's really more hitting than petting.)

We love the kitchen cupboards! There's hardly a moment I'm in the kitchen that he's not standing up next to me or playing with the pots & pans. He also realized how to open the drawer underneath the stove the other day. I found him stuck sitting Indian style in it! (see pic)

Gab gab gab. Rinse and repeat. Tons of jabber! We'll often hear through the monitors that he's awake- just up and talking to himself.

And finally... he found his 'boy parts' during bath time last night. Probably one of the more hilarious things I have ever witnessed! He first found his tummy, then realized "Heyyy! There's something *else* down there too!" He also found that the boy parts are a lot of fun, which made him laugh, which made ME laugh. I couldn't stop and it egged him on even more. Ahhh, and so it begins...

Happy Birthday, Dr. Sister!

2009-09-24T23:06:00.003-04:00

Happy Birthday to my beautiful, smart and funny sister, Becky! Hope it was awesome!

It's the day of the show, y'all!

2009-09-23T12:36:00.005-04:00

Just a quick note to wish our friend Brad a fantastic opening night on 'The Broadway'! He's an amazingly talented dude and is in the brand new show 'Memphis' at the Shubert Theatre on West 44th in New York City. Break a leg Brad, we love you and can't wait to see it!

Tailgating #2

2009-09-19T20:41:00.005-04:00

Today was a beautiful day! We headed in to tailgate at the Penn State/Temple game earlier than last week. We left the house a little after 7, picked up one of Michael's classmates and were to the site by about 8. Sleeping in was definitely enticing, but we fully admit that it was nice to not have to sit in traffic to get to the stadium! We made it in time for Todd & Liz's yummy breakfast casserole and pulled pork sandwiches and I took pumpkin bread this week.

We were all pretty tuckered out by the time we got home around noon, so we took a nice two hour family nap. We spent the rest of the afternoon doing an impromptu house 'straightening' and then I made some more pumpkin bread- this time with real pumpkin from the Farmer's Market. (Yesterday's was canned pumpkin) It was definitely a longer process (steaming the pumpkin, pureeing, etc), but worth the wait!

Bloggin' in the Dark

2009-09-18T20:03:00.001-04:00

The power is out tonight. Not sure of the cause yet, but it's apparently city wide and they've even cancelled the local HS football game.

We'd just gotten home from dinner and were giving Max his nightly bath when the power started flashing on and off. And on and off. And then it stayed off and has been ever since. We lit candles & oil lamps and were fortunate to still get him down to bed. Michael checked on Max a bit ago and reported that he'd turned on his music & light toy in his crib. Good thinking, little man!

Now we're sitting here playing on our phones. What did we do before technology?! I joked that it feels like we should be playing Boggle or Scrabble by candlelight. I also wished (aloud) that we had a good bottle of wine. Unfortunately we've just got hard stuff: scotch & gin. Guess we could get hammered in the dark...

Instead, I'm blogging about this... but the night is still young!

Website

2009-09-17T02:34:00.000-04:00

We've gotten our website back up with a new host. It's easier to maintain, so hopefully we'll be doing that on a regular basis. Also, we'll be posting massive amounts of pictures on the photo page links. Click on the picture to see the galleries.

www.keysandhammers.com

Pictures, finally!

2009-09-14T21:21:00.002-04:00

So I recently purchased Adobe Lightroom on the recommendation of a friend, and I must say, it's wonderful. I've been easily able to publish some of my photos of my London trip quickly and easily to our website. Currently, I have the "Best of Ireland" pictures up. Take a look!

www.keysandhammers.com/irelandphotos/

And if you shoot in RAW format, seriously look at Lightbox if you haven't already...

Tailgating!

2009-09-12T16:06:00.003-04:00

This morning we tailgated with our friends Todd & Liz at the Penn State vs. Syracuse game. I've never been to a Big 10 game and was a little blown away by the magnitude of everything. Full-size motor homes, tents, grills, tables/lawn chairs- the whole shebang! It kind of reminded me of the MN State Fair. Traffic was crazy, though probably not as crazy as it might be on a nicer game day. (It was drizzly this morning, though it stopped in time for the game.) We missed Todd's breakfast, but made it in time for his delicious steak sandwiches. I took cinnamon applesauce bread and butterscotch brownies as well. And of course, the Yuengling!

The CAT says...

2009-09-10T20:03:00.002-04:00

I had a routine follow-up CAT scan today. I didn't really get the news I wanted. Well, it's not fantastic news, but its not terrible either. There are small nodules in my abdomen and in my lungs. This is the path that testicular cancer would take if it spread. However, they are around 6mm, meaning they are too small to worry about right now. The nodules in my abdomen were on my last scan, but they didn't mention anything to me at Geisinger because they were too small. According to my Penn State doctor, he saw them on my last Geisinger scan, and they haven't grown, which is good news. The lung nodules could have always been there, and this machine today was the first to pick them up, either because it was newer or because of a different technique. Anyway, there's nothing saying that it's cancer, but they are keeping a serious eye on it. They'll know more when they get the blood test results. If those are funny, they'll call me back in pronto. If I don't hear anything...well, then I get to worry until Dec 15th, when my next CAT scan is.

So, now we get to worry until December. Unless we hear back about the blood, then we'll worry a little sooner.

Sleeping: Then & Now

2009-09-08T22:08:00.005-04:00

A year ago tonight Michael started our CarePages site for Max. We were so grateful for all the support we received and it was a great way for both of us to keep everyone up to date on what was going on in the NICU. Painful as it is at times, I've found myself re-reading the entries and I'm so thankful we have them. They're definitely going in Max's scrapbook!

Duet

2009-09-08T14:37:00.003-04:00

Got this from my dear friend Fran today. An awesome impromptu piano duet by a couple at the Mayo Clinic. They've been married 62 years and he'll be 90 this year!

Max's 1st Birthday Cake: The Process

2009-09-06T19:53:00.008-04:00

The original design
The cake
Naturally, our Pittsburgh Penguin had Asian eyes!
Time to blow out the candles!
Penguin Autopsy (courtesy of Jill H.)

A Letter to our Son

2009-09-05T10:08:00.002-04:00

Dear Maxwell,

Today you are one year old. It's so amazing to think that a whole year has passed since we first 'met' you. It has been a year filled with both joys & hardships, but we've made it to this point stronger, wiser and even more grateful for life.

Your entrance into the world was a scary one. There were over a dozen doctors in the room with us, all there to help as soon as you were born. Did you know that they tried to give me an epidural FIVE times, but none of them took? You *knew* that something was wrong in that womb of yours and you were ready to come out, so I said "Screw it! Get him out NOW!" Did you also know that Mommy & Daddy were supposed to start birthing classes just three days after you were born? Funny, huh? I didn't have the slightest idea how to push correctly, so it took quite awhile.

But after over 32+ hours of labor, at 11:07am our life forever changed. You were born and we became a family of three! You were very sick, my love, so they immediately took you to a bed next to us to help you breathe. It all happened so quickly, but we got a glimpse of you and I remember saying to your Daddy "We have a Max!" and feeling a gush of love I didn't know possible.

We spent the next 30 days in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit with you. You gave us quite a scare on your first night of life, but we'll talk about that another time when you're older. Just know this: you're a miracle baby! That's why everyone calls you 'Miracle Max'. We don't want you to get a big head, but you're truly amazing. ;) You defied all odds, especially that first night, and we take *nothing* for granted anymore.

You melt our hearts on a daily basis and we fall in love with you over and over and over. Waking up to your smiles and chatter and watching you fall asleep in our arms at night makes life worth living. Your spunk, curiosity, energy and flirtatiousness continue to amuse and amaze us.

Momma was adopted by Grandma & Grandpa Fu when she was a baby. You are my first known blood relative. You even look like me! It's you and me, kiddo. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I could go on for hours, so I'll bring this to a close. Little Boy, you have brought a richness to your Daddy's and my life that I never knew possible. Your unconditional love is the most amazing gift we could ever receive and I hope that you know just how much we adore you. We love you with all our hearts.

Happy 1st Birthday, Bubba.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy

Max Eve

2009-09-04T22:59:00.004-04:00

A year ago as I start this post we'd been at Geisinger for a day. I'd received another shot to strengthen Max's lungs and we'd done a lot of sitting. The one 'nice' part of being at Geisinger was the amazing facilities. My room was downright posh! It was like a fancy stay at a hotel. More importantly, we had an amazing nurse, Kristy, taking care of us. (Kristy, if you're reading this- we love you and are so thankful for everything you did for us!)

After a long uncomfortable night in the chair, Michael checked into a hotel room up the road to send some email updates to friends & family, as well as try to get one last night of sleep. The plan was that after my final shot, they'd let the labor progress and if Max chose to be born, we'd go with it. My contractions were getting relatively strong by about midnight and I was just plain scared/uncomfortable being by myself. I sucked it up for awhile, but eventually it got unbearable and I called my poor husband and asked him to come back and sit with me. The man was there within a half hour. (What a saint!) He spent the rest of the night watching the monitor and helping me in and out of the contractions. (He would have little to no sleep by the time Max was born the next morning.)

Tonight I worked on The Cake. I'd been throwing around the idea of either a penguin or elephant (Max's current favorite stuffed animal/comfort toy given to him by his Fairy Quadmother Calley!) and ultimately decided on a Pittsburgh Penguin. Keepin' it real, yo. I baked two round cakes tonight (yellow) and will decorate it when we get to Dave's tomorrow. The perfectionist in me is constantly reminding myself that it doesn't matter if it's not 'exact' or if something goes wrong, but rather that Max's Mommy is making a cake for his very first birthday!

My Dad decorated a cake for Max's Minnesota birthday party last week. (see above) The little man wasn't really into smashing his face into it and as you can see, he wasn't a fan of getting his hands sticky! It was hilarious. We'll see how he does tomorrow! (He did LOVE it when we sang Happy Birthday to him though!)

Tomorrow is the big day. I can hardly believe it's been a whole year. Max's Uncle Dave is hosting a party at his house tomorrow afternoon and I think it will be quite emotional. (I've already teared up several times today while just watching the boy sit and play!) It will be really special because all the people who were there right after he was born will be in attendance- Dave, Nana, Michael's best friend Jill and our dear friend Shawn.

To be continued tomorrow... Miracle Max will officially turn one at 11:07am EST!

Countown to One

2009-09-03T21:04:00.003-04:00

One year ago tonight (almost to the hour as I start this post) my water broke. Michael had moved to Penn State one month prior to start grad school and I stayed with my kickass brother-in-law and his roomie while I finished up in the office in Pittsburgh. I'd been here all of three days when the water broke. At first I wasn't sure what was going on (I'll spare you all the details), so I called the on-call doctor. He said to keep an eye on things, but wasn't overly concerned. Awhile later (and again, no details), I went to Michael and said "I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think something weird is going on" and called the doctor again. This time he told me that he couldn't promise I was okay without an exam and to go to the ER immediately.

As we got in the car and headed into town, little did we know how much our lives were about to change...

"Well, this is kind of cool. We're getting a dress rehearsal for the real thing!" said the theatre geek (ahem, me) to Michael was we walked into the ER.

We checked in and sat down in the waiting area. I think this is when I started to freak out and I remember shaking uncontrollably- the kind of shakes you get when you're really cold. We didn't have to wait too long to be seen and we had an amazing nurse taking my blood pressure, asking questions, etc. To this day I wish we knew her name because she was so calm and comforting. I also seem to remember the three of us cracking jokes, laughing and having fun even under the circumstances.

The doctor came in, did an exam and then said words I'll never forget: "Yes, your water has indeed broken".

WHAT?! I'm not due for two months!

And then the realization of "You can't UNBREAK water... this is it."

It's all kind of a blur after that. The hospital (the one where we'd planned to have Max) was not a facility that would be able to handle such a premature birth and it was suggested immediately that we be transferred to either Geisinger or Hershey Medical Center (aka where Jon & Kate's gazillion kids were born). Both were highly recommended, so we chose Geisinger because it was closer (one hour).

They immediately gave me a shot to strengthen Max's premature lungs as much as possible and informed us that chances are, I'd be kept at Geisinger until Max was born and the goal was to keep him in there as long as possible. They then sent Michael home to walk the dog, pack a bag and call our families and transported me by ambulance. The same wonderful nurse rode right next to me, which was again, very comforting. I remember her wishing me luck and telling me to be sure to bring our baby in to visit her when were back in town. (Again, darn that I don't know her name because I totally would.)

I was wheeled in and moved to a room with another woman. At one point, her mother came over and introduced herself and said that her daughter was pregnant with triplets and only 27 weeks. They hooked me up to all the IV's and machines, which was quite painful because the nurse couldn't find a 'good' vein and poked me multiple times without luck.

Michael arrived shortly thereafter and I've never been so happy to see him in my life. I remember being petrified and uncomfortable (they hadn't been able to put in a catheter yet and I despise bedpans), but everything was okay as soon as he walked in the room. The trooper stayed with me and spent the rest of the night sleeping in a very uncomfortable chair.

Little did we know as we attempted to sleep that we'd have a child just a day and a half later, not to mention the journey the coming month(s) would prove to be.

To be continued tomorrow...

Mall Stroller Fun

2009-09-01T01:38:00.005-04:00

In addition to being a teacher, theatre director & EMT, Max's late Grandpa B was a volunteer fire fighter. Max would do him proud, don't you think?

Aunt Jean

2009-08-30T00:31:00.000-04:00

As many of you already know, my Aunt Jean was the victim of a horrible hit-and-run a mere block from her home in Brooklyn this past fall. She has been in and out of the hospital for the past 8 months due to numerous complications from this accident. Her assailant has still not been identified. (GRRR!)

Your prayers, good thoughts, chi or whatever you believe in are greatly needed and would be much appreciated right now, as she is once again back in the hospital, suffering seizures and diagnosed with toxic hepatitis.

The combination of all the drugs she has been given since the accident have caused serious damage to her liver. A biopsy will be performed on Monday in hopes that the doctors can figure out exactly what's causing the problems.

Thoughts and prayers of strength for my amazing Uncle Allan and cousins Chad & Matt would be appreciated as well.

I'll owe you all a backrub or something.

Thank you so much.

Max can work it

2009-08-25T00:21:00.004-04:00

Our Boy never ceases to amaze me.

He was a champion flyer again yesterday! He slept through the brief first flight from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia. We had a window seat and an empty seat between us and a very nice gentleman who also slept the whole flight. The second flight, however, we were on the aisle and from the get-go I could tell that the woman next to us was going to be a bit of a problem. She was obviously less than pleased to see that she was sitting next to a baby as soon as she boarded. Throughout the 2.5 hour flight to Minneapolis she got up not one, two or three times, but FOUR to use the restroom. (Though to be fair, I understand if she was having 'one of those days' and just really needed to use it often.) Max was pretty much wide awake for the flight, but would doze off on my shoulder every now and then, which is (oh so conveniently) when the lady would decide to ask for me to get up and let her out. (I was 'wearing' Max in his totally awesome Ergo Carrier) After the first two times I politely asked her if it'd be easier for me to move to the window seat in case she needed to get up again, but she said no, she was fine sitting in that seat. 'She' being the operative word! I was over it by the third potty break and when she asked for the fourth time I said "Really?". (The answer was 'yes', btw)

At one point I dozed off and when I woke I looked down and saw Max cooing, batting his long beautiful eyelashes and doing everything short of a song and dance number. I turned around to look behind us and he was apparently full-on flirting with a lady down the aisle! (I'm so sure my almost one year old can pick up chicks on a commercial airline!)

Anyhoo, we made it safely to Minneapolis and were greeted by my Dad, the infamous Stu Fu! My brother, his girlfriend and my niece & nephew arrived later in the afternoon and we've been having a grand ol' time since. I'm so thankful that we were able to get back to see him! We hadn't seen each other since Thanksgiving of '07, as we didn't get back for either of the holidays last year due to our new addition to the family.

As I mentioned in a previous post, Max is doing a great job with going to bed at night now. He was bathed, read, fed and in bed by 7:30pm last night. We all watched the Mall Cop movie (or rather, they watched and I fell asleep on the floor- apparently I *might* snore) and then I went up to bed a little before 11 or so. Max immediately woke up as soon as I opened the door and started crying. I thought he might be hungry, so I gave him a bit of a bottle until it was apparent that he just wanted to be up with me. As Michael will attest, this Boy has played me a lot when it comes to bedtime. He will do everything shy of reading poetry and confessing his love and adoration for me to convince me to let him stay up. (And yes, it may work most of the time- at least until I finally bought into the 'crying it out' method because yes, it does work and yes, I will fully admit that it FRICKIN' ROCKS to have the rest of the evening to myself!)

But I digress... so he doesn't want any more of the bottle and just wants to play at 11pm (or really midnight Eastern time). So I laid him back down in the crib and turned out the lamp. He cried. And cried some more... and I then witnessed his thought process when trying to get me to pick him up from his crib. I laid down on my bed and tried to stay as still as possible and watched in the shadows. First, he continued the dramatic crying while standing up in the crib. Then after a few minutes he'd stop and listen to see if I was buying into it. When it became apparent that I wasn't, he cried some more, even more dramatically. Repeat. Then he sat down in the crib... more crying... wait wait wait... cry some more. (Now while I'm sure this is probably something most parents have witnessed, I must note that it just tickled me to no end. During my pregnancy with Max I had many recurring dreams of waking up to see our child standing up in his crib. So yeah, pretty much a dream come true. And the fact that the child of two theatre professionals could cry sooo dramatically and with such feeling made it all the better!) After awhile I couldn't lie still anymore and either coughed or shifted on the bed accidentally, which set him off even more because he. knew. I. was. there! (And how DARE I not pick his adorable self up?!) I could tell he wasn't going to give up anytime soon, so I finally got up and moved to the spare bed in Stu Fu's office across the hall.

And he was out within 10 minutes. Sucker!

Think Momma will be sleeping in the office the rest of the week while we're here...

Next up: walking!

2009-08-21T16:47:00.002-04:00

Max's physical therapist & Early Intervention (EI) caseworker just left. Little Dude rocked PT today! He was getting a little ornery before they arrived and I was worried he wouldn't 'perform', but he perked right up as soon as they walked in the door. (Hi, is someone destined for the stage?) For those of you unfamiliar with EI, every so often we update with a new (physical) goal for Max. The latest was for him to be able to sit up by himself and play with toys on the floor. He's had that down pat for quite awhile, so we updated today- his next goal is to WALK independently! The scary/exciting part is that he's probably not that far off. His therapist was amazed at the progress he'd made even since last week. We're now going to see her once every other week, as she feels he's on the right track!

It's hard to believe that Max will be ONE in just a little over two weeks. Lucky guy is going to have two birthday parties this year- one in Minnesota with my side of the family and one in Pittsburgh with Michael's! It blows my mind that at this time last year Michael was starting his first year of school and I was finishing up in the office in Pittsburgh and preparing to move and join him, then Max's very early arrival only three days after I moved. Needless to say, prepare yourselves for nostalgic posts in the coming days leading up to Max's birthday!

I'm happy to report that our 'Sleep Wars' have been lessening night by night. The bummer part for our boy is that bathtime is no longer fun, as he's starting to understand the routine: bath, book, bottle, bed. He now knows that a bath will inevitably lead to bed, so the joy of splashing is no more! Alas. Last night he was asleep in less than 15 minutes! V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!

The job hunt continues, though I do know that my agencies have sent out my resume to a couple specific jobs, so we'll see. The amusing part/kicker of my layoff is that now that Max is on a regular sleeping schedule, I'd have been able to work uninterrupted all evening. Again, alas...

Earlier this week, I had the opportunity to meet an internet friend for the very first time 'in real life'. It was so fun finally talk in person and we (Max & I) had an awesome time. (Thanks, K!) On a funny random note, it turns out that K's office is not even a mile from my old office, which means that the couple weeks I trained in the office earlier this spring, we were literally right up the road from each other. Crazy!

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

God Bless the USA!

2009-08-20T14:02:00.002-04:00

My brother Eric is officially back on U.S. soil for his two week service leave from Iraq! He arrived in Atlanta shortly after midnight this morning and then flew to Minneapolis where he was reunited with our dad and his girlfriend! Max and I will be flying to Minnesota on Sunday for the week to see him. (Max & Eric have not met yet!) I'm so proud of him (as well as his fellow Army servicemen & women), but I'm thrilled he's HOME!